Lines Never Spoken May 21, 2007Posted by skinbad in Commenting Tips, Sports.
Rick Reilly writes the last page column in Sports Illustrated. He’s a good and often humorous writer. A recent column consisted of lines he says have never been used in the history of the world. Such as:
Shaq, you shoot the technical.
Please, Carl Lewis, will you favor us with another song?
So you’ll be going straight from work to the Raiders game?
No way the Yankees can afford him.
I wondered about lines never uttered at Innocent Bystanders.
- That treatment sounds kind of metrosexual to me. I’m worried about what the guys might say.
- Boy, that dude is one big-time Vegas performer. Don’t know a thing about him.
- I don’t think I’m going to renew that magazine. Beautiful Plants and Creative Profanity just isn’t me.
- I really want to make the smart vehicle purchase.
- I can’t thank my parents enough for the opportunity to play the clarinet. The cheerleaders all wanted a piece of my licorice stick. IYKWIMAITYD!
- This legal opinion is far too obtuse to write at great length about.
You know you can do better. So do.