The Grim Reaper Cat July 26, 2007
Posted by Michael in News.trackback
Yet another reason to believe that cats are evil.
PROVIDENCE, R.I. – Oscar the cat seems to have an uncanny knack for predicting when nursing home patients are going to die, by curling up next to them during their final hours. His accuracy, observed in 25 cases, has led the staff to call family members once he has chosen someone. It usually means they have less than four hours to live.
“He doesn’t make too many mistakes. He seems to understand when patients are about to die,” said Dr. David Dosa in an interview. He describes the phenomenon in a poignant essay in Thursday’s issue of the New England Journal of Medicine.”Many family members take some solace from it. They appreciate the companionship that the cat provides for their dying loved one,” said Dosa, a geriatrician and assistant professor of medicine at Brown University.
Maybe it’s solace for the family, but what about the patient? I’ll betcha they are not LOLing when Oscar starts hanging around.
Get away — you freaky little feline pervert!
Hopefully the patients don’t notice Oscar’s sudden affections. He works in the a section of the nursing home that treats people with Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s disease.
Here’s a picture of Oscar at work, stalking the halls and sniffing for his next “buddy.”
To be fair to Oscar, this can work both ways. I suppose it’s good news if he ignores you.
Oscar is better at predicting death than the people who work there, said Dr. Joan Teno of Brown University, who treats patients at the nursing home and is an expert on care for the terminally ill
She was convinced of Oscar’s talent when he made his 13th correct call. While observing one patient, Teno said she noticed the woman wasn’t eating, was breathing with difficulty and that her legs had a bluish tinge, signs that often mean death is near.
Oscar wouldn’t stay inside the room though, so Teno thought his streak was broken. Instead, it turned out the doctor’s prediction was roughly 10 hours too early. Sure enough, during the patient’s final two hours, nurses told Teno that Oscar joined the woman at her bedside.
Oscar the cat predicts patients’ deaths – Yahoo! News
UPDATE: For a different take on the same story, see the post at Perfunction by Cuffy Meigs.
How many more reasons do we need?
Iz in ur bedz
Puln ur plugz
Now if that cat could pay a visit to those damn rabbits and squirrels eating my garden.
AIYEEEEEE!!! DEATHCAT!!
*throws a shoe*
im in ur paradize
playin da harps
“…And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee!”
I like this story and I like Oscar.
I’d rather have his gentle presence beside me than you bunch of paranoid, snivelling hounds.
…snivelling hounds.
I thought we were retards or morons or something?
Michael,
I hate the be the one to tell you this, but I think in that pic of Oscar, he was giving you the “eye” and purring. It may be nothing, but I just wanted to let you know.
Don’t worry, I probably was just imagining it.
Have you updated your will lately?
Can I be a beneficiary?
I’m with KC, Oscar is a good cat.
But seriously, how does he know?
“You ever dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?”
*paws over mouth and nose*
good cat
Oxymoron. Just ask Moses.
Lipstick, we’re supposed to pick for the Book Club next month. I would suggest:
Cat on a Hot Tin Roof
Cat People
The Cat Who Loved Me
Cat’s Cradle
Cat’s Eye
That Darn Cat
The Cat Who Came to Dinner
The Cat in the Hat
Brews, I know you don’t delete my comments. It was a joke.
I know Michael likes to edit comments on the sly, though.
I was trying to find my prediction because I think I predicted 72 wins and they wound up getting 75 wins.
How about The Evil Furry Ass-Licking Hairball-Cacking Life-Sucking Feline Abuser Who Came to Dinner?
That cat could be Spudder’s evil twin.
dave, lol!
Bart, how many this year?
80, Brew.
Sorry.
24-37 the rest of the way? Are you nuts? This isn’t the Cubs we’re talking about you know.
Never send to know for whom the cat purrs; It purrs for thee.
heh
Well, while we’re on a literary bent;
Though wise men at their end know Oscar is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
I am become Death, destroyer of worlds.
It’s not my death you should be worried about, Erwin.
And now Oscar is near
And so I face the final curtain,
My friends, I’ll say it clear,
I’ll state my case of which I’m certain.
I’ve lived a life that’s full, I’ve travelled each and evr’y highway
And more, much more than this, I did it my way.
Richard was gay.
Cowards pet me many times before their deaths;
The valiant never touch my fur but once.
So was Felix.
Baloney!
…Those purring harbingers of blood and death.
Out Damn Oscar!
Hey, you just keep that cat away from me. I hate cats.
Cry woe, destruction, ruin and decay
The worst is death, and Oscar will have his day.
I’m gonna knock you the fuck out.
Brute!
Regardless of his frightful powers, I think this kitty looks fabulous!
O Oscar where is thy sting, O Oscar where is thy victory?
I’m very dead.
One can survive everything, nowadays, except death, and live down everything except a good reputation.
My baloney has a first name;
It’s O-S-C-A-R.
My baloney has a second name;
It’s M-A-Y-E-R.
Oh, I love to eat it every day,
And if you ask me why, I’ll say,
Cause Oscar-Mayer has a way to K-I-L-L-Y-O-U.
Don’t forget to see my new play, Oscar Takes a Holiday, opening soon.
I was used to blugeon Bob Crane. Google it.
And “statuette” is not gay.
I’ve had my suspicions about Felix for a while too.
I’ve had my suspicions about Felix for a while too.
I wore a cat skull on my head.
Just so you all know, I have already initiated a wrongful death lawsuit against Oscar, on behalf of all his poor, dead victims.
Now, since the victims are, in fact, dead, when I win this multi-million dollar suit against Oscar, I will not be taking my usual 30% fee. Instead, I will be keeping it all.
I’m sure the poor, dead victims of Oscar’s wave of death would have wanted it that way. In fact, I think I hear them speaking through me even now!
~~~~keep the money, John. Keeeeep the moneeeeeyy~~~~
Vote Edwards ‘08!
Mr. Edwards,
Don’t forget to invest in those hedge funds and subprime mortgages you’re so against. Isn’t it fun to be naughty!
Isn’t it fun to be naughty!
Oooooooooo, don’t get me started, Oscar. {giggle}
Hey, you seem nice. Want to join me on the campaign trail? We can get our hair and nails done, take a sauna together, parrafin dip our hands together…
Ya know, just hang out and do “guy” stuff. Whaddya say?
Yer crackin’ me up, Wiser.
who?
ixnay on the owingblay my overcay, ichaelmay.
Jeeez…..
Huh? I didn’t say which ones were yours.
Although obviously, #40 “Wiener Song” is the true comic genius on this thread.
I thought that was the Jeffrey Dahmer song
“Mah baloney has a first name”…
Oh. um, Sorry. I thought you were talking about….ummmm, well, see, I….er, um…well, never mind then.
***smacking forehead repeatedly*** stupid, stupid, stupid!
and #40? A true classic, worthy of the IB Comment Hall of Fame.
IB Factoid Of The Day:
Wiserbud has posted 717 comments at IB to date, beginning with:
Catastrophe KC!
We’ll have to conspire.
Lipstick, is there anything I can do to help?
Just, you know, being, helpful.
Yeah.
I think KC and I will manage to get to our goal all by ourselves.
Thanks though!
I came in late, sorry, Geezer totaly beat me to prosecution exhibit A, or whatever it’s called, I would ask a lawyer, but I prefer the opinions of my fellow human being.
I thought that was the Jeffrey Dahmer song
Somewhere I have a cassette tape of myself (not a musician) playing drums while my two best friends in highschool play guitar, and bass.
The song that is being “refined” is “The Jeffrey Dahmer Song,” and the ridiculous effort was performed by “The Korean Slave Dogs.”
I was 15 when we recorded that, and one of the funniest damn things I remember from highschool.
I think KC and I will manage to get to our goal all by ourselves
Imagine extreme sexual frustration.
Now smack it, with a claw hammer.
Twice.
Ok, thanks!
I didn’t see that Dave, I was too busy masturbating furiously.
Paraffin Boy strikes out again.
*snort*
I put paraffin on the hammer.
I put paraffin on the hammer.
I could interpret that, but I would have nightmares.
Wiserbud has posted 717 comments at IB to date,
And not one worthy of the IB Hall of Fame or an invitation to be a main page poster.
Hmph.
How many comments have I made? And how do you check?
It puts the paraffin in the basket.
How many comments have I made?
Sobek, you have made 107 main page comments and 572 regular comments. Your first was:
And how do you check?
In keeping with my duties as Site Administrator, every day I blockcopy text and take detailed notes on the activities of those commenters that I deem to be likely troublemakers — for example, you, Wiserbud, Kevlarchick, Steve, and Bart. This information comes not only from your online activities, but also from the webcams I have in your house, and your phone conversations. I maintain this information on my hard drive, with a backup copy at Iron Mountain. It is organized into multi-dimensional data cubes which meet the formatting requirements of the Lutheran Millennium Foundation™. This is basically a proprietary Gaussian cube file format for volumetric data with 32-bit encryption. It is accessible by a robust search engine.
Please be assured that I do not select “likely troublemakers” arbitrarily. Your privacy interests are given *appropriate* consideration. In order to identify likely troublemakers, I scrupulously follow¹ the criteria promulgated by the Lutheran Millennium Foundation™, with whom I have a data-sharing agreement, as do most Lutherans.
I hope this answers your question.
¹Well, OK, my *surveillance* of KC may be an exception.
for example, you, Wiserbud, Kevlarchick, Steve, and Bart
SWEET!!!
I’m one of the good boys!
I think you missed the point, WP.
I said, “for example.”
*takes note*
I enjoy the IB Factoids.
Keep ‘em coming.
Geezer, the only reason a Spudder like you is not on my Watch List is because you are exempted by Criterion 46 promulgated by the Lutheran Millennium Foundation™:
46. Those who exhibit familiarity with the 95 Theses need not be closely watched.
Michael has posted 719 main page comments and 4,107 regular comments.
All of Michael’s comments exhibit proper Lutheran theology.
Seriously, Sobek, I know the number of your main page comments just by looking at the Users table in the All-Knowing IB Dashboard™.
I can quickly find your regular comments by doing a search in the Comments log with your email address. This will pick up your comments regardless of fake names, and regardless of whether you are using your home or work IP address.
I enjoy the IB Factoids.
Keep ‘em coming.
OK then.
Retired Geezer has posted 217 main page comments. I think about 73% of those posts were pimping his own blog, but that’s just an estimate. He has posted 2,586 regular comments, so I give him a pass on the blog-pimping.
Plus, RG actually started this site, and I’m kinda sentimental about that.
Plus, Mrs. Geezer is really cool, so I have to take that into consideration.
I think about 73% of those posts were pimping his own blog
I better start posting something there to make it worthwhile.
Oh, I welcome my new Lutheran Overlords.
Oh, I welcome my new Lutheran Overlords.
You’re going to regret saying that unless you’re really, really fond of tuna casserole and bad doctrine.
The name Luther makes me giggle. It’s just funny, like Chester, or Goober.
troublemaker? Me? Why, I am as innocent as a new-born lamb. I would never cause any trouble for the fine folks at IB, even if some of them are of the Lutheran faith. (okay, That’s not as easy as I make it out to be, but I try, Lordy, Lordy do I try!)
As long as we don’t have any Methodists here, you can rest assured that I will never cause any problems whatsoever.
…tuna casserole and bad doctrine.
Uh, is it Dolphin Safe tuna?
…tuna casserole and bad doctrine.
Beats the hell out of bad casserole and tuna doctrine.
Is it dolphin safe doctrine?
Oh, but of course, me boyo. We certainly can’t have any of those heathen dolphins, what with their swimming free in the ocean and having s-e-x outside of marriage, as part of our orthodoxy.
Now be a good lad and fetch me my whiskey, why don’t ye.
I ask you, brothers and sisters, do not repudiate, desecrate, or copulate with the dolphins. You must venerate!
As long as we don’t have any Methodists here
I thought Mrs. Peel was a Methodist.
trouble brewin’
Kill the cat. Problem solved.