Tailgating Advice Requested September 30, 2008Posted by Edward von Bear in Ducks, Economics, Entertainment, Food, Humor, Man Laws, News, Personal Experiences, Sports.
Tags: Brewfan points and laughs, Insurance Fraud?, New Jersey Bonfires
Back in September of 2000, my wife and I went to Milwaukee to visit a friend of her family and his wife, who were both working for Marquette University at the time. In addition to the Miller Brewery Tour, we went to old County Stadium in its last year of existence to watch the Cardinals play the Brewers.
Amazing, at least to a fool like me, was the fact that the local Cheeseheads were tailgating for a baseball game. Tailgating, I thought, was reserved for football. Or at least a championship caliber baseball team. But you learn something every day.
One of the other fascinating aspects of tailgating that I had never encountered before were these concrete trash can looking things with “For Hot Coals” painted on them. Obviously, the use, and proper disposal of, hot charcoal by-products is an art form in the Frozen Wasteland Tundra.
Well, according to the fine folks at Busted Coverage, the folks at the New York Jets Games Toxic Waste Dumps might need a refresher on how to properly tailgate, especially when it comes to handling of hot coals.
Hell, even I know that you don’t park your car over hot coals. You put them down the back of the shirt of the guy in front of you at the game.
Operation Soothe September 29, 2008Posted by Pupster in Ducks, Economics, Handblogging, Heroes, Man Laws, News, Philosophy.
Tags: Shoulder rub maybe
Tough day today for a lot of folks, I sense some worried looks out there in pretend internet friend world. I’m not here to tell you it’s going to be alright, I haven’t a clue.
I am here to provide the musical equivalent of a cold washcloth across the forehead. So sit back and relax people. See if you can talk the significant other into a foot-rub, or something better even. Eat some cake if you’ve got it (I’m fresh out).
Post your own soothing suggestions in the comments.
Update: As usual, our favorite Inked Smart Chick does her level best to class-up the joint with one soother:
and one invigorating favorite:
Needs more cowbell. (Thanks, TI!)
Brewfan manages a shot at our woodwind-sucking host with this selection:
Careful…after watching that dude for a while, I think I might just have lost my heterosexuality.
26 Long, Long Years September 28, 2008Posted by BrewFan in Humor, News, Personal Experiences.
You may have gotten the impression over the years that I might be a Brewers Fan. You would be correct. The last time my beloved Brewers were in the playoffs was in 1982. I was a newlywed with a lovely wife who had a bun in the oven. In the weirdness that often characterizes the space-time continuum 1982 seems like just yesterday and ages ago.
I’m not sure we’ll get any further but for the next couple of weeks I get to enjoy baseball in October.
The Best Kind of Cake September 28, 2008Posted by Pupster in Family, Food, Heroes, Personal Experiences, Philosophy.
Tags: Pineapple goes up
The best cake is not birthday or wedding cake. Cake for no reason, which is what I was presented with today, is the best kind cake. Mrs. Pupster and the Pupster Boys planned the whole thing; and waited until I was outside doing yard work to put this bad boy together and bake it up all yummy just for me. I am a lucky, lucky man.
I have to tell you, the gesture makes me very happy, and I feel loved and appreciated. And full. If you have someone who deserves a cake, bake them one. No occasion is required. Pie is also acceptable.
A Moment For The History Books September 28, 2008Posted by Michael in News.
Our friend Barry in CO has discovered that Obama is not only a political sensation, but a biological miracle.
Barry also offers some desperately needed perspective on the financial crisis. He points out, correctly, that none of this is so important if you have access to the Sarah Palin swimsuit video from the 1984 Miss Alaska competition.
Here’s my advice to the IB guys. After you watch that Sarah Palin video about sixteen times, and you’re tired, watch it one more time just to admore Sarah’s footwork. She has practiced the elegant beauty pageant turn until she has it down cold. I think this sort of dedication to a task is more important that foreign policy expertise.
I’m not kidding. In my head, that sort of dedication to a goal is comparable to what it takes, at a young age, to be an Eagle Boy Scout. Palin was accustomed to cutthroat competition at a very young age, and she has played hardball as a politician ever since. I personally don’t give a rat’s ass that she is not steeped in the lore of foreign policy experts. You can buy that advice anywhere. What matters is the underlying character.
The Horrible Truth About the Economic Crisis September 27, 2008Posted by Michael in Crime, Economics, News, Politics.
You probably have already seen this at AOSHQ, Nice Deb, or somewhere else, but I just got around to watching it and I’m going to put it up here just in case you haven’t seen it.
If you have not seen this, WATCH IT OR I WILL PERSONALLY TRACK DOWN YOUR LOCATION BY REVERSE ENGINEERING YOUR IP ADDRESS, THEN I WILL COME TO YOUR HOUSE, SLASH YOUR TIRES, AND STEAL ALL THE FRIED CHICKEN, BACON AND PIE IN YOUR REFRIGERATOR!
I mean it. Except for Cathy. I just talked to her and she has not seen it, but it does not make a lot of sense to steal the bacon in my own refrigerator.
Everybody in America should see this before they vote. Plus, the musical background is pretty cool.
Fruit Basket Ripoff? September 26, 2008Posted by Retired Geezer in Crime, Science.
Being an excellent son, Flyin’ Brian occasionally sends Mrs. Geezer a Fruit Basket.
The sentiment is well appreciated but I think he got ripped off. Does this look like $60 worth of stuff to you?
He orders it through a Tele-Florist so that adds an extra $15 to the total.
Who eats apples anyway?
Happy Oktoberfest! September 25, 2008Posted by Edward von Bear in Ducks, Economics, Entertainment, Family, Food, Heroes, History, Man Laws, News, Travel.
Tags: Bier ist wunderbar, I Really Hate Hauling Pianos, Ich liebe Brüste, Sure Beats Hauling A Piano
Unlike those filthy Scandis, Germans really know how to tie one on and celebrate. So, enjoy, and drink some Spaten this weekend.
Or, this could be some motivation [WARNING! MAYBE NSFW OR NOT SAFE FOR SENSIBILITIES. YOU BE THE JUDGE.]
Ft. Hood Stuff September 25, 2008Posted by daveintexas in News.
From the cover of the latest Fiscal Notes, a magazine from the Texas comptroller whose distribution list I am on (and have no idea why). It was originally started back when Carole Keeton Rylander Strayhorn Anderson Smith-Barney was the comptroller, and she used it shamelessly for self promotion.
Anyhow, Ft. Hood. It’s named after Confederate Texas General John Bell Hood, who lost an arm at Gettysburg. I’ll bet that sucked.
The base was established around 1943 as Camp Hood, a training base for Army tank destroyer battalions. It is the headquarters of III Corps, and also the home of the 1st Cavalry Division, the 4th Infantry Division, and the 13th Corps Support Command. That info is not from the article, I just knew it my own self.
It is the largest single-site employer in Texas, with 52,000 assigned personnel and 9,600 civilian employees.
It contributes more than $3 billion to the Texas economy. Thanks, Ft. Hood!
The base occupies more than 335 square miles. How many more the article does not say.
One out of every 10 active duty soldiers in the US Army is assigned here. The other 9 are assigned somewhere else.
The Army ranks it number 1 among the Army’s 97 installations in terms of future capability.
Ft. Hood has no nude or topless swimming areas, AFAIK.
London Olympic Toilets Must Not Be Offensive September 24, 2008Posted by Edward von Bear in Ducks, Economics, News, Politics, Terrorist Hemorrhoids.
Tags: Low Flush Toilets Are Really Shitty, Toliet Sensitivity, Will That Be Two Flushes Or One?
In preparation for the 2012 Summer Olympics, designers for the London Olympic Park have determined that the sensitivity level for the facilities must go to 11. How is that feat accomplished?
Easy, my dear chap. Sensitivity is accomplished by placing toilets in a certain fashion so as to not face Mecca, which would be a bad thing. And that’s not all. It seems washing facilities will also bear the Seal of Approval.
An ODA spokeswoman confirmed that a ‘percentage of general toilets would not face Mecca’ out of sensitivity.
She could not say how many toilets would turn away from the East.
Also as part of the design, special washing facilities will be linked to Islamic prayer rooms.
It is not the first time toilets have changed direction to accommodate Muslims.
Last year, thousands of pounds of taxpayers’ money was used to ensure toilets at Brixton prison in London did not offend Islamic law.
Muslim prisoners complained of having to sit sideways on toilets so as to not break code.
Faith leaders in the government pressured officials to approve turning the toilets 90 degrees.
Well, at least that’s one thing off my mind. Now that Olympic toilets will be tolerant, the Religion of Peace will leave us alone. Right?
Personally, I am more upset with the substandard quality of those low-flush European toilets than anything else. But that’s just me.
FBI Investigating Rich White People, and Michael Sells a House September 23, 2008Posted by Michael in Economics, News, Politics.
Tags: Add new tag
Martha Stewart is out of jail, so I guess they have an empty cell. The FBI is investigating corporate misdeeds, and they are hot on the trail of greedy Rich White People to blame for our problems.
Rest assured, this guy pictured below is not going to go to jail. He’s not a corporate executive. He’s not even white.
WASHINGTON – The FBI is investigating four major U.S. financial institutions whose collapse helped trigger a $700 billion bailout plan by the Bush administration, The Associated Press has learned.
Two law enforcement officials said Tuesday the FBI is looking at potential fraud by mortgage finance giants Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, and insurer American International Group Inc. Additionally, a senior law enforcement official said Lehman Brothers Holdings Inc. also is under investigation.
The inquiries will focus on the financial institutions and the individuals that ran them, the senior law enforcement official said.
The law enforcement officials spoke on condition of anonymity because the investigations are ongoing and are in the very early stages.
Officials said the new inquiries bring to 26 the number of corporate lenders under investigation over the past year.
Oh sure, let’s blame those Rich White People.
Meanwhile, the real criminals are skating. By “real criminals” I mean the politicians who supported the Community Reinvestment Act – long after it was known that the CRA was a scam, based on fraudulent assertions that “underserved communities” had been victimized by “redlining” and were in dire need of “affordable housing.” So we saw the same old thing — Federal handouts easily become entrenched and addictive, even after it is clear that they have no rational purpose (don’t get me started on dairy subsidies).
Democrats, like the highly influential Charles Rangel, Chairman of the Ways and Means Committee, blocked reforms that were urged by many Republicans, including John McCain. To no avail — that “affordable housing” was real important for “underserved communities.” Banks were literally forced to issue imprudent loans that defied all previous standards of creditworthiness, and avid sales reps cashed in commissions by selling ARMs and up-front teaser rates to the ignorant.
Previously sober institutions like Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae, insulated from risk by the implied protection of Uncle Sam, were more than happy to package these mortgages and securitize them to gullible investors who believed the housing market could only go up. Never mind the inexorable demographics of an aging Baby Boom population.
Thus was the corruption born that led to our current crisis.
Guess who is going to pay for this?
And people like me. Rich White People. I’m one of those five percent of the U.S. wage earners that pay sixty percent of the federal income taxes.
Plus, just today I flipped my Ohio house to a relocation company for it’s appraised value in a dead market, which means I took a loss. A big loss.
Rangel, of course, thinks that he is only guilty of becoming a political target due to some inadvertent errors:
Rangel claims that he is being villainized by Republicans as part of their effort to win back the House, as well as headline-seeking reporters, and said that he has done nothing wrong. Rangel has been hit by a series of press reports detailing alleged ethics violations, including his failure to pay taxes on $75,000 in income from a vacation home in the Dominican Republic, his use of his congressional office to raise funds for the Rangel Center in New York City, and his control of four rent-stabilized apartments in a Harlem high-rise that he lives in. The House ethics committee is expected to vote next week to begin a formal investigation of the allegations, as requested by Rangel.
“The campaign season has begun, and to no great surprise, I’m now a Republican talking point. But I assure you, I’ve brought no dishonor to my family, the Congress, my constituents, or my country,” Rangel said in his letter.
Fuck you, Charles Rangel.
Thomas Doerflein, German Zookeeper Who Raised Knut, Found Dead in Apt September 23, 2008Posted by daveintexas in News.
No cause of death mentioned. He was 44.