New Year’s Resolution – BE POLITE January 2, 2009
Posted by kevlarchick in Women Ranting.trackback
That’s right. The movement is on to be NICE in 2009. Since I already am the epitome of sweetness and light, this will not be an issue for moi.
Stop being such an asshole. The world does not revolve around you, bitch. And clean up the potty mouth you nasty tranny.
Gratuitous Badass Hotness
well, ok. Polite is good.
I’m sure I can fake that.
Meteor shower tomorrow morning.
http://www.space.com/spacewatch/081219-ns-meteor-shower.html
I’m sure I can fake that.
*wonderin’ what else Dave fakes…*
Good NewYear resolution, KevlarChick. Monthly magazine we get from our church body had their lead article on this subject but is framed as “respect.”
I’m goin’ with it.
Polite? I’ve got your polite right here! *grabs crotch*
How am I doing so far?
Polite? I’m always polite. Okay sometimes….okay, I’ll work on it…
How am I doing so far?
Not so good, dumbfuck.
That’s right. The movement is on
You’re not kidding. I haven’t seen a ‘nice’ thread turn this quickly since the Compliment Thread.
Oh, hey look- it’s the first Fuckitall Friday of 2009!
Nice to see that Hostages influence spreading globally. Mheh. We own all the intartubbiewebbiethinggies.
*hands Brewfan another Schlitz*
BIW, do you really think “Imperial Consigliere” sounds less gay than “Agent Provocateur”?
Nice, eh?
Hmm…
I find WP’s stream of consciousness comments to be somewhat more enlightening than most of the nutritional information listed on cereal boxes.
The Nevada Supremes published a couple of good cases in the past week or so. Two criminals got their appeals denied, and a very prominent ambulance-chaser-type lawyer got publicly reprimanded.
do you really think “Imperial Consigliere” sounds less gay
Sez the one whose alter ego is a guy who wears tights and satin panties.
No, not this guy, THIS GUY.
and a very prominent ambulance-chaser-type lawyer got publicly reprimanded.
I just love it when a member of our tribe continues the tradition of giving us all a bad name.
BIW, do you really think “Imperial Consigliere” sounds less gay than “Agent Provocateur”?
This from the character who has had three separate young male “wards” over the course of his career? And the title change is actually a Rottie thing.
And that creepy old guy as well.
And say nothing for the fondness of way too tight outfits
Besides, a face-off between Bats and Doom? Hang it up. Doom would sooooooo OWN Bats.
I find WP’s stream of consciousness comments to be somewhat more enlightening than most of the nutritional information listed on cereal boxes.
Hey! Them’s Fightin’ WOrds!
BiW, the state bar really seems to hate this guy. He used to have billboards advertising himself as “The Heavy Hitter.” The bar said that was misleading, because it suggested he’s the only heavy hitter in town, and made him change it to “A Heavy Hitter.”
Now whatever bad things you want to say about this guy, that’s some pretty lame nitpicking.
The case that was recently handed down, on Christmas Eve in fact, was about assisting in the unauthorized practice of law. Mr. Hitter had an associate who did pre-litigation stuff like sending demand letters to insurance companies. Mr. Hitter says that’s not the practice of law, and besides, Associate is an attorney (just not licensed in this state), and besides, the Rule is unconstitutional, and besides, a public reprimand was too harsh. I might be persuaded on that last point — it’s not like he was stealing money, or acting incompetently or something — but he’s obviously wrong on all his other arguments.
That is nitpicky. Here, our state bar is too busy pushing the touchy-feely agenda to bother with the unauthorized practice of law. Each edition of the monthly publication basically makes me wonder “Gee, which socially liberal agenda item is the cause this month.” If my membership was not manditory, I would resign.
The movement is on to be NICE in 2009.
Man, fuck that shit.
KC, one of your comments landed in the spam bucket at my site. I just now spotted it (the new interface doesn’t highlight spam-bucketed comments the way the last one did) and fished it out. Sorry about that.
Hitter had three previous private reprimands for the same kind of unauthorized practice, so that’s why a disciplinary panel stuck him with a public reprimand, and why the Court affirmed.
I suspect your state bar deals with UPL more than you realize, BiW. I’m on our local disciplinary board (but for the record, I had nothing to do with Hitter’s discipline), and I see all kinds of things that are dismissed or result in private stuff that no one will ever hear about.
One of the criminal things is a manslaughter-DUI case. Defendant slammed into a car that was stopped at a red light. The victim’s car was pushed into a ditch, where it erupted into flames.
Defendant tells the policehe had one beer at 8:00 p.m. the previous night. The accident happened at 6:30 a.m. The cop sees Defendant’s eyes are bloodshot and he reeks of alcohol. They do a blood test an hour after the crash and he’s at .07 BAC. Legal limit is .08, so the prosecutor tells the grand jury that if it’s .07 an hour after the crash, it must have been at least .08 at the time of the crash.
Defendant argues the prosecutor can’t just assert that — he needs to present expert testimony to the grand jury about retrograde extrapolation. District Court agrees. The Supremes reverse: it’s pretty simple math, and a grand jury can handle that. Bad guy will go on trial for all counts.
The other criminal case is an appeal from a death penalty conviction. Defendant’s car breaks down on the highway. Victim stops to help him. According to forensic evidence and a jailhouse confession to another inmate, Victim called Defendant a nasty name, so Defendant hit Victim in the head with a crowbar, shot him in the head with forehead, bashed his head a few more times, dragged his body into a ditch, stole his car, and drove away.
Two days later, police in Chicago arrest Defendant for possession of a stolen vehicle, and they find blood stains and otherwise determine that Defendant killed a guy and stole his car. Defendant offered up numerous, inconsistent stories (including my personal favorite, “I borrowed the car from a friend, whose name I don’t know” — yeah, lots of people loan their BMWs to strangers to drive across country).
Conviction and sentence affirmed.
Well, that assclown in the red Suburban on my way back from lunch caused me to already violate the Resolution
I’m a little disappointed in the direction of this thread. KC puts it on a tee for you morons to make the funny and what do we get? Eh. Nevermind. lf any of you retards ever had an original thought it would die of loneliness.
*chugs Schlitz*
*recalls I just pissed in a can of beer but can’t remember which one*
That’s the spirit eddie! But it may be too subtle for the bottom feeders.
*recalls I just pissed in a can of beer but can’t remember which one*
Its ok, eddie. I got yer back. I made sure that was the one I handed to Brewfan.
Interesting prank, Eddie, but are you sure Brew would be able to even notice the difference?
Hey, you lawyers have an unfair advantage when it comes to being impolite!
Sobek:
Easy. Urine tastes better
Brew, you have no idea.
Three men all took their seats in First Class for a cross-country trip. They greeted each other and found out that they were headed to the same golf resort. Before long, one made reference to how nice it was to get out of the office and leave the beeper behind. Another agreed with him, leaving the third to ask “So you’re doctors?” Both answered affirmatively and asked what he did for a living. He replied that he was a personal injury medical malpractice attorney. The travellers fell silent for a while, and then the attorney announced he was thirsty, and offered to get sodas for the three of them. Seeing that the attorney had slipped his loafers off and left them on the floor in front of his seat, the doctors agreed, and while he was retreiving the sodas, the doctors put thumbtacks in each of his shoes.
He returned, handed sodas to the doctors, and the three of them chatted politely for the rest of the flight. As the plane was making its approach, the doctors could hardly wait for the attorney to put his shoes on. As the plane descended, the attorney slipped his shoes on, making almost no change in his expression other than a slight tightening of the jaw. The doctors tried to hide their disappointment as the plane taxied to the terminal, and avoided eye contact with the attorney. Before the plane came to a stop, they could hear the attorney muttering “Tacks in shoes, spitting in sodas, when will this animosity end?”
“when will this animosity end?”
Not until doctors realize they’re only supposed to commit malpractice against people who make unsympathetic witnesses.
Easy. Urine tastes better
I would be interested in how you know this exactly?
BrewFan chugs a Schlitz:
http://www.on9now.com/video/v429.html
I’ve often thought of starting a site dedicated to nothing but lawyer jokes, because afterall, everyone knows that lawyers suck…until they need one of us.
umm..
I never have tasted urine, and I have never consumed Schlitz. But the urine smells better, so I based my decision thusly.
Sound science, eh?
Yeah, but can you light your urine on fire? Will drinking your urine make you fart? These, these are the burning questions that must be answered.
“Sound science, eh?”
Good enough for us!
So, on this whole “nice” thing. Does it apply to pointy-headed propeller-wearing booger-eatin insufferable know-nothings in IT departments? Particularly that sonofabitch DBA who had the sorry misfortuce of picking the wrong day to piss me off?
Cause if it does, I sorta got a late start on this resolution.
*Dave photographs picture of him with Kimber in hand and a note: “Hey It Guy! This Is For You*
Dave:
I always thought people get a mulligan on their resolutions.
that sonofabitch DBA
This is an interesting, and accurate observation. In general, DBAs tend to be assholes. I don’t know why this is but it is. I cringe anytime I work on a project that involves a DBA. If you think I’m exaggerating, just look at all the new developer technologies that are coming out; many are trying to shift software development away from typical DBA tasks such as writing stored procedures.
I’ve often thought DBAs were the clarinet players of the software development lifecycle orchestra.
What the hell did we do wrong?
Haters!
*eats booger*