Yeah, Those Reichwing Wingnuts Are In The Wrong And Can Never Win May 13, 2009
Posted by Edward von Bear in Food, History, Politics.Tags: Reagan
4 comments
Or, as I like to call it:
“Moderates, RINOs, and Washed out bicycle riding has beens who run dying blogs can go fuck off.”
Just remember this speech given by a failed Reichwinger:
Inspired by a comment Bart (I think) left somewhere on Teh Innertubes today.
Love Story May 12, 2009
Posted by Michael in Music.28 comments
Don’t you judge me for this!
I am still a white-hot crimefighting thug.
The video tells you to crank up your sub-woofer at 4:27. It’s a good idea.
Beat Down May 12, 2009
Posted by Sobek in News.272 comments
A long time ago, when I was a wee blogger just knee high to the Llama Butchers, I found a funny blog called Beat Down, or something like that. Basically, the co-bloggers would state who needed a beat down, and the appropriate object to be used in said beat down. I have no idea where that blog is, or whether it still exists. But I do know that humor about savage beatings is inherently funny. So with that in mind:
10. Tim Geithner, with a sock full of untaxed nickles.
9. Dave in Texas, with heterosexuality.
8. Joe Biden, with a ream of other peoples’ resumes.
7. Michael, with pure Lutheran casserole.
6. Wanda Sykes, with a piece of scrap metal from United Flight 175.
5. Skinbad, with a can of caffeine free Coke.
4. George Lucas, with the un-tinkered-with film reel of A New Hope.
3. Harry Reid, with a feather (anything heavier than that and I’m afraid I’d be advocating murder)
2. Nancy Pelosi, with a syringe full of Botox, wrapped in CIA memos showing she knew about waterboarding in 2002.
1. Jean-Pierre Jeunet, with the script for Alien: Resurrection
Who/what did I miss?
I went to Texas to meet a jerk, but it wasn’t Dave or Michael May 11, 2009
Posted by kevlarchick in Women Ranting.38 comments
I have a customer who hands me my ass on a platter daily. Mean, demanding, very smart. Commanding, deep voice. I went to Houston to meet him last week.
I envisioned a Jack Bauer/Clint Eastwood/Wolverine hybrid stalking into the hotel lobby, snarling. I thought he would set off a flash bang at the breakfast buffet. I thought he would spit tobacco juice on my shoes and beat my ass with a nice piece of hickory.
I was very excited.
Then I saw him. After recovering for a full 30 seconds, the only thought in my mind was “this guy HAS to be a commenter at Ace of Spades.”
Yes, it was that much of a shock. A bummer too. Now when he calls to administer my daily beatdown, I have to suppress my giggles.
On a much hipper note, I went to NASA one afternoon. Now I think I understand the phrase “an erection lasting more than four hours.” It was very cool. Tried to look up Mrs Peel, but they wouldn’t let me “look around.”
They wouldn't let me ride on this
Happy Monday! -lauraw May 11, 2009
Posted by anycomments in Ducks, Law, Travel.Tags: Wish she would hock up that cotton ball
44 comments
Hi! It’s Monday!
Couldn’t you just stab yourself in the cheek?!
YAYYY!!
Here, have some Macy Gray with your coffee:
I just love her voice. Even at the end there, where it sounds like she’s choking on a Triscuit.
I try to sing a song and I choke
Try to hold a note and I grumble…
OK.
Anyway.
Hi.
One Nation, Under God May 10, 2009
Posted by Michael in Politics, Religion.11 comments
President Barack Obama said in Turkey : “We do not consider ourselves a Christian nation or a Jewish nation or a Muslim nation. We consider ourselves a nation of citizens who are bound by ideals and a set of values.”
“Ideals.”
A “set of values” (note the math concept) that are secular and without reference to God.
Check out your state’s constitution.
Alabama 1901, Preamble We the people of the State of Alabama , invoking the favor and guidance of Almighty God, do ordain and establish the following Constitution..
Alaska 1956, Preamble We, the people of Alaska , grateful to God and to those who founded our nation and pioneered this great land.
Arizona 1911, Preamble We, the people of the State of Arizona , grateful to Almighty God for our liberties, do ordain this Constitution…
Arkansas 1874, Preamble We, the people of the State of Arkansas , grateful to Almighty God for the privilege of choosing our own form of government…
California 1879, Preamble We, the People of the State of California , grateful to Almighty God for our freedom…
Colorado 1876, Preamble We, the people of Colorado , with profound reverence for the Supreme Ruler of the Universe…
Connecticut 1818, Preamble. The People of Connecticut, acknowledging with gratitude the good Providence of God in permitting them to enjoy …
Delaware 1897, Preamble Through Divine Goodness all men have, by nature, the rights of worshipping and serving their Creator according to the dictates of their consciences…
Florida 1885, Preamble We, the people of the State of Florida , grateful to Almighty God for our constitutional liberty, establish this Constitution…
Georgia 1777, Preamble We, the people of Georgia , relying upon protection and guidance of Almighty God, do ordain and establish this Constitution….
Hawaii 1959, Preamble We , the people of Hawaii , Grateful for Divine Guidance … Establish this Constitution.
Idaho 1889, Preamble We, the people of the State of Idaho , grateful to Almighty God for our freedom, to secure its blessings …
Illinois 1870, Preamble We, the people of the State of Illinois, grateful to Almighty God for the civil , political and religious liberty which He hath so long permitted us to enjoy and looking to Him for a blessing on our endeavors …
Indiana 1851, Preamble We, the People of the State of Indiana , grateful to Almighty God for the free exercise of the right to choose our form of government …
Iowa 1857, Preamble We, the People of the St ate of Iowa , grateful to the Supreme Being for the blessings hitherto enjoyed, and feeling our dependence on Him for a continuation of these blessings, establish this Constitution.
Kansas 1859, Preamble We, the people of Kansas , grateful to Almighty God for our civil and religious privileges establish this Constitution.
Kentucky 1891, Preamble We, the people of the Commonwealth are grateful to Almighty God for the civil, political and religious liberties.
Louisiana 1921, Preamble We, the people of the State of Louisiana , grateful to Almighty God for the civil, political and religious liberties we enjoy.
Maine 1820, Preamble We the People of Maine acknowledging with grateful hearts the goodness of the Sovereign Ruler of the Universe in affording us an opportunity .. And imploring His aid and direction.
Maryland 1776, Preamble We, the people of the state of Maryland , grateful to Almighty God for our civil and religious liberty…
Massachusetts 1780, Preamble We…the people of Massachusetts, acknowledging with grateful hearts, the goodness of the Great Legislator of the Universe In the course of His Providence, an opportunity and devoutly imploring His direction.
Michigan 1908, Preamble. We, the people of the State of Michigan , grateful to Almighty God for the blessings of freedom, establish this Constitution.
Minnesota, 1857, Preamble We, the people of the State of Minnesota, grateful to God for our civil and religious liberty, and desiring to perpetuate its blessings:
Mississippi 1890, Preamble We, the people of Mississippi in convention assembled, grateful to Almighty God, and invoking His blessing on our work..
Missouri 1845, Preamble We, the people of Missouri , with profound reverence for the Supreme Ruler of the Universe, and grateful for His goodness . Establish this Constitution…
Montana 1889, Preamble. We, the people of Montana , grateful to Almighty God for the blessings of liberty establish this Constitution ….
Nebraska 1875, Preamble We, the people, grateful to Almighty God for our freedom . Establish this Constitution.
Nevada 1864, Preamble We the people of the State of Nevada , grateful to Almighty God for our freedom, establish this Constitution…
New Hampshire 1792, Part I. Art. I. Sec. V Every individual has a natural and unalienable right to worship God according to the dictates of his own conscience.
New Jersey 1844, Preamble We, the people of the State of New Jersey, grateful to Almighty God for civil and religious liberty which He hath so long permitted us to enjoy, and looking to Him for a blessing on our endeavors.
New Mexico 1911, Preamble We, the People of New Mexico, grateful to Almighty God for the blessings of liberty..
New York 1846, Preamble We, the people of the State of New York, grateful to Almighty God for our freedom, in order to secure its blessings.
North Carolina 1868, Preamble We the people of the State of North Carolina, grateful to Almighty God, the Sovereign Ruler of Nations, for our civil, political, and religious liberties, and acknowledging our dependence upon Him for the continuance of those…
North Dakota 1889, Preamble We , the people of North Dakota, grateful to Almighty God for the blessings of civil and religious liberty, do ordain…
Ohio 1852, Preamble We the people of the state of Ohio, grateful to Almighty God for our freedom, to secure its blessings and to promote our common.
Oklahoma 1907, Preamble Invoking the guidance of Almighty God, in order to secure and perpetuate the blessings of liberty, establish this
Oregon 1857, Bill of Rights, Article I Section 2. All men shall be secure in the Natural right, to worship Almighty God according to the dictates of their conscience . . .
Pennsylvania 1776, Preamble We, the people of Pennsylvania, grateful to Almighty God for the blessings of civil and religious liberty, and humbly invoking His guidance….
Rhode Island 1842, Preamble. We the People of the State of Rhode Island grateful to Almighty God for the civil and religious liberty which He hath so long permitted us to enjoy, and looking to Him for a blessing…
South Carolina, 1778, Preamble We, the people of he State of South Carolina grateful to God for our liberties, do ordain and establish this Constitution.
South Dakota 1889, Preamble We, the people of South Dakota, grateful to Almighty God for our civil and religious liberties …
Tennessee 1796, Art. XI..III. That all men have a natural and indefeasible right to worship Almighty God according to the dictates of their conscience…
Texas 1845, Preamble We the People of the Republic of Texas, acknowledging, with gratitude, the grace and beneficence of God.
Utah 1896, Preamble Grateful to Almighty God for life and liberty, we establish this Constitution.
Vermont 1777, Preamble Whereas all government ought to enable the individuals who compose it to enjoy their natural rights, and other blessings which the Author of Existence has bestowed on man . . .
Virginia 1776, Bill of Rights, XVI Religion, or the Duty which we owe our Creator can be directed only by Reason and that it is the mutual duty of all to practice Christian Forbearance, Love and Charity towards each other . . .
Washington 1889, Preamble We the People of the State of Washington, grateful to the Supreme Ruler of the Universe for our liberties, do ordain this Constitution
West Virginia 1872, Preamble Since through Divine Providence we enjoy the blessings of civil, political and religious liberty, we, the people of West Virginia reaffirm our faith in and constant reliance upon God …
Wisconsin 1848, Preamble We, the people of Wisconsin, grateful to Almighty God for our freedom, domestic tranquility..
Wyoming 1890, Preamble We, the people of the State of Wyoming, grateful to God for our civil, political, and religious liberties, establish this Constitution…
Thanks to a tip from Cathy.
President Obama at the White House Correspondent’s Dinner May 10, 2009
Posted by Michael in News.8 comments
Sharp Dressed Man May 9, 2009
Posted by skinbad in Food, History, Science.26 comments
Tomorrow is Sunday. A necktie is a requirement for part of my day. I have a couple of jackets and one suit. It’s very important to wear a proper tie to strike the sartorial tone required for a man about church. I’m having a hard time deciding what to wear. If I go with the navy blazer, I’ll probably wear this one:
Plague--Red/Blue
Plague–Red/Blue. A very cool, very popular tie for a very serious pathogen. Yersinia pestis is credited with killing up to two-thirds of the population of major European cities during the 14th century pandemic. Plague, often referred to as the “Black Death,” is a bacterial disease transmitted by fleas, from rats to humans. It survives yet today as a potential killer. Prevention centers on improved sanitary conditions and the eradication of rodent reservoirs.
Thatcher’s Last Stand Against Socialism May 9, 2009
Posted by Michael in Heroes, History.22 comments
Dang, I miss her.
Look who is leading us, and compare to Margaret Thatcher in her final appearance in Parliament. Keep in mind, when she took office in 1979, she also inherited a rapidly declining economy. Her response was to privatize state-owned industries, curtail the meddling of civil servants in the economy, reduce the power of trade unions, and cut taxes.
Thanks to Six Meat Buffet.
And Now For Your Viewing Pleasure, I Present To You An Eagle Taking On A Small Deer May 9, 2009
Posted by Edward von Bear in Ducks, Entertainment, Food, Handblogging, History, Humor, Man Laws, News, Sex, Sitemeter, Sports, Travel.Tags: Animals, Awesome, Kill Kill Kill, Look out below!, Where are the goats?
4 comments
Actually, it’s something called a Water Chevrotain, but you knew that already.
The Global Warming Hypothesis: Computer Modeling vs. Fact May 8, 2009
Posted by Michael in News, Science, Terrorist Hemorrhoids.12 comments
We’re talking about ocean heat here. Not temperature — heat.
Meaning, actual energy, which is what matters if you are interested in global warming.
The global warming scare is primarily based on a computer model, relied upon by many governments, advocacy groups and international agencies, projecting possible outcomes based on many assumptions as well as known relationships, and this model is now several years old. How has it fared in comparison to real-life observations?
Um, looks to me like the lines are going in different directions. WTF?!?
Albert Einstein once said, “No amount of experimentation can ever prove me right; a single experiment can prove me wrong.” Einstein’s words express a foundational principle of science intoned by the logician, Karl Popper: Falsifiability. In order to verify a hypothesis there must be a test by which it can be proved false. A thousand observations may appear to verify a hypothesis, but one critical failure could result in its demise. The history of science is littered with such examples.
You can get a detailed explanation of this graph at Watts Up With That?
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Greatest. Movie. Trailer. Evah. May 8, 2009
Posted by Edward von Bear in Commenting Tips, Ducks, Economics, Entertainment, Family, Food, Heroes, History, Humor, Law, Lurkers, Man Laws, Movies, News.Tags: My Little Pony, Please shoot me, punch yourself in the face
11 comments
Yeah, I know it’s fake. But having endured total immersion in the world of My Little Pony, Polly Pockets, Old School WInnie The Pooh, Poodlena, The Littlest Pet Shop, learning how to put a girl’s hair into a ponytail, the merits of pink polka dot t-ball bats over the neon purple ones, how to polish toenails, and what kind of Garnier Products help de-tangle wet toddler hair (hint: Smoothing Milk), I have learned to appreciate what little girls like.
That is why I laughed my ass off when I saw this trailer. If you don’t like it, just punch yourself in the face.