A Day at the Office October 18, 2009
Posted by Michael in Economics, Entertainment.trackback
I found a video of the people who report to Dave in Texas, and I thought you might enjoy meeting them.
This video was intended as a message for Dave about his management style, but they never worked up the nerve to send it to him. I, however, have discovered it for you in the dark recesses of YouTube.
Dave was in an all-day staff meeting with the boss that day. He kinda got reamed out in front of everyone because his team is not making their numbers. Dave promised the boss that he would do a better job of communicating his expectations to his group.
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It figures a bunch of mac book users would pick a Backstreet Boys song to do.
BOOM! Roasted!
That. Is. Fucking. Hilarious.
I gotta brag on my boys a little. I have 14 indirects, two directs. IT is one of those occupations that can breed more than a few fellas who think their shit don’t stink, and love the power of their awesome braininess.
I’m blessed with a team that is talented, but more than that, works their asses off to take care of their customers. They treat everyone with respect and courtesy, no matter what level. They smile. They have fun on the job, but get the job done.
There hasn’t been a day I haven’t gotten some random compliment from somebody about one of them.
They take good care of us, and it’s my privilege to work with em, and do what I can to take care of them.
It kills me to say this, Dave, but I sorta knew you are the kind of guy that brings out the best in the folks who work for you, even IT geeks, and your last comment demonstrates exactly why.
^
That was your quota of nice remarks from me for 2009.
Thank God the year is almost over then.
*hands you some Gatorade*
Holy moly that video was queer.
I have 14 indirects
What the hell does that mean? A matrix? Poor Dave.
I’m the non-lip-synching chick consistently just snapping her gum and doing her damn job while all her coworkers are going gonzo shit-fer-brains all around her.
Michael is the homo emoting like crazy at 1:23.
Dave is the cutie massaging air-titties and saying ‘desire’ at .45.
It means that they all have to wear name-tags, or let Dave make up pledge nicknames for them.
You shall be…Coffee Breath
You shall be known as…Bad Tie
>> Dave is the cutie massaging air-titties and saying ‘desire’ at .45.
thefuck? shit, you’ve seen me do that.
damn. damn damn damn.
Who is the hot strawberry blond?
Dave?
Phone number?
Shit at my last corporate job I had 32 directs and 140 indirects, located in 10 different offices in 7 states. After doing that for ten years startup life is peace and quiet.
32 directs and 140 indirects
Wow. That is a fucked-up org chart for a fucked-up company. It’s not possible to do that right.
Glad to hear you got out.
*snicker*
Layers. At large corps., they can only get so big, before the center falls through just like a big wet souffle.
But they still keep trying.
In some positions, one person really does have to manage the whole souffle, until their brain just can’t do it anymore. Then they get replaced by a new brain. It has to be one sharp human brain managing the shit. No computer can do it, and it can’t be a shared job with other brains. One.
In certain high-action dispatching posts of the transportation industry, they tell you right up front that they are going to pay you handsomely, but drain you until you simply cannot function anymore. That’s the deal.
Those jobs turn over at a rate averaging 18 months- 2 years. And when those peeps are done, they are done. Crispeh-cruncheh, done.
But really good dispatchers are some of the brightest, quickest, most well-organized minds you can ever hope to meet. They do a 4-dimensional jigsaw puzzle with the key pieces missing, every morning and night, with a gun to their heads. For years on end.
Have you hugged your dispatcher today?
that’s kinda like being an air traffic controller.
Trust me, Laura, I know precisely what you are talking about. I now do what I do because my accounting-fu had prepped me to handle multiple tasks in an organized manner. But the crush, combined with my inventory, allocation, costing, analysis, and order fulfillment, can get to be a bit much.
That’s why I have stuff like this place, H2, Ace’s, DPUD, and my twitter page to keep me sane
Management. Ever hear of the rule of 3 to 5? No one can effectively manage more than three to five elements. And by elements, I mean direct reports. If you need to manage six elements, you’re generally better off adding another layer of management.
Management. Ever hear of the rule of 3 to 5?
In the old days it was 7.
Would somebody explain what ‘indirect’ means now? When I was a Mangler I had 4 exempt and ~30 non-exempts reporting to me. Are those ~30 now called ‘indirect’? When I was managing, indirect meant a matrix style of governance, which was a fancy way of saying nobody takes responsibility for anything.
Brew, it does not mean non-exempt and it is not matrix management. It just means the folks who report to the people who report directly to you, and thus are indirectly responsible to you. In other words, everyone in a company is an “indirect” of the CEO except for the SVPs and the secretary that directly report to the CEO.
In the patois of government contracting, “Direct” means they charge directly to the contract: i.e. they are doing actual contracted work. “Indirect” means that they are charging to something like marketing or engineering support or finance or vacation: i.e., all those other corporate functions that aren’t an actual part of contract tasks.
Oh, sorry Brew, I meant it in the traditional management structure context, I have two managers reporting to me, with 14 reporting to them. Although we also have that contracting thing happening that Geoff describes, most of mine are a combination of direct/indirect on contracts (i.e. a guy could log 24 hours a week on a specific task/task order) and another 16 on Admin/overhead G&A).
Anyway they’re good troops. I’m particularly impressed with the new young guys, but they’re Army vets and that’s just a bonus for me.
Lessee, 16, of which 6 have served in the Army. That’s a lot of it right there (their dedication and professionalism).
Also, Laura, at my old job our dispatch folks were indispensable and really good. Traffic management in the yard is aided now with satellite tracking so they perform a complex dance every day getting trailers offloaded, empties staged and loaded and out the gate. It’s amazing.
I worked as an emergency dispatcher for a security co. for 4 yrs putting myself thru college. Never, ever, ever again. We were supposed to end every call w/ “Is there anything else I can help you with today/tonight?” Seriously. Call Los Angeles at 0200 and ask some dude that question. I’ll bet you I’ve heard it all.
Seriously. Call Los Angeles at 0200 and ask some dude that question. I’ll bet you I’ve heard it all.
TI, you can call me right now and ask that question, and you’ll hear some new stuff.
While I appreciate your willingness to walk down memory lane w/ me. No.