WTF is This Shit? (Updated) February 4, 2011
Posted by daveintexas in Crime, Ducks, Entertainment, History, Man Laws, Nature Shit, Personal Experiences, Religion, Science, Sex, Sidebar Flag Bullshit, WTF?.trackback
Enough White Death to make an entire footprint.
UPDATE BY MICHAEL:
I guess I'll work on my tan some other time
WAIT WAIT – I know the answer!
Drive safely! Scott was describing some of the TX auto-carnage vid that was being shown on Fox this morning. Sounds awful.
If you could drive that truck around the back of my house without getting stuck (you couldn’t), it would sink in up to the headlights.
Where the snow drifted, the hood would be buried.
I just drove slowly and it was fine. But I passed several dumbasses stuck in bar ditches who weren’t driving slow. Idiots.
Including a local cop who lost control and ran into somebody else. See, idiots, supra.
The hood of my truck? Thassa lotta snow.
brrrrrrrrr!
I’ve had to sleep with a down comforter lately.
Over five inches so far at my place. We’re getting a second band right now. Real light fluffy stuff. The puking lions have funny elf hats. One has a big ole icicle beard that goes all the way down to the water.
It’s kind of unbelievable, the last couple Winters you guys have had there.
Fortunately, it will be short for you. Back to 60 degrees in no time at all, I’m sure.
Dallas had more snow events last year than I can recall in 30 years. We had a couple of hard freezes that year, but it’s been 20 years since we had a stretch of 4 days with highs in the 20s.
But Sunday will be 60.
Also, I noticed it was 3 in CT this morning. 3.
W.TF?
The cold and snow has helped/forced me get things done and stay focused. Not going to complain. Won’t do any good anyway.
Take it easy, everyone.
Yeah but they’re used to it. No need to feel sorry for them. They have antifreeze in their blood.
True, Michael. The blood thickens or something. I walk outside every day with the dog. Below zero was not too painful – there was no wind.
Eh, it gives me a stiff neck and backaches. But it’s true that 20 degrees feels balmy and comfortable now.
My problem isn’t 22 degrees.
It’s 22 degrees with 20mph winds.
That’s my problem.
I saw a frozen puddle in front of my house in Phoenix a few days ago. Maybe the 3rd time that’s happened in my 17 years here.
60 and sunny today though…
It’s actually pretty nice in the Spud State this week. Highs in the 40′s and lows around freezing, ok it’s going to get down to 19 one day.
Fun Fact: In the eleven years we’ve lived here, I can’t remember any day that the temperature dropped below zero. This is, after all, the Banana Belt of Idaho.
Hey Dave, how was the hottubbing in the snow last night? Bet you haven’t had too many chances to do that.
Just got back from doing some shopping. It is a hoot to drive around here. We have no snow removal equipment. The cops are closing off major roads where there is a hill, people are skidding around, it’s a regular demolition derby. I felt like hot shit with my 4WD. You just need to be careful to stay away from the clowns who don’t know how to drive in this, and don’t know that they don’t know how to drive in this.
The spa, with snow falling, and big clouds of steam.
That was awesome
I remember hottubbing in sub-zero weather in St. Louis (but no breeze at all). This was our first hot tub back in the 80s when they were still a novelty, and we were all gung-ho about using it. I felt an odd scratching sensation on my back when I moved. Turned out that the steam had formed a thick sheet of ice between the hair on the back of my head and the waterline whilst I was relaxing for a few minutes.
Hot tubbing in the cold is good stuff. But the sprint from the tub to the house can be painful.
I have a large Jacuzzi tub in the bathroom with a re-heater. I damned sure ain’t going outside in 18F temps to get in a tub!
Back in college, I took a spring break trip to Steamboat Springs, CO with some drinkin’ buddies. Our condo had an outdoor pool AND a pair of hot tubs.
You know that medical professionals strongly recommend that you don’t drink while hottubbing? Well, I didn’t know that in 1988. We would sit in that tub for 2 to 3 hours a night with our beers staying cool in a snowdrift right behind us the whole time.
The last couple days we were there, some guys from Kansas State showed up at our condo, and they went with “quantity over quality” poolside….with a pony keg sitting in a rolling mop bucket they “appropriated” from the maintenance shed. It was really convenient, you would just reach behind you and wheel the bucket around the tub until it got to the person who wanted a drink.
The snow petered out by the time it got down here, thankfully. All we had was “sneet” (or “wintry mix” as the tv likes to call it). It’s mostly dried up now.
But my hibiscus has been kilt again. How the hell is it supposed to get back to its old 6′ of height and 3′ of diameter with 1″ diameter trunks if this keeps happening?
Dad, there is a picture of me in that hot tub wearing my unicorn swimsuit and holding a beer when I was about six. Good times…
Dad, there is a picture of me in that hot tub wearing my unicorn swimsuit and holding a beer when I was about six. Good times…
*Who says we weren’t cool parents?*
That unicorn suit was pretty bad-ass too. Thank YOU, Messiah Lutheran Basement Rummage Sale!
But my hibiscus has been kilt again. How the hell is it supposed to get back to its old 6′ of height and 3′ of diameter with 1″ diameter trunks if this keeps happening?
You can give it a whole additional climate zone worth of protection if you cover it with a cloth sheet, and then a plastic sheet, just before the cold snap. Weight down the edges with bricks or whatnot to keep the breeze out.
Just keeping a plant in a pocket of still air during a snap can prevent killing temps from, um, killing.
…alternatively, you could put a little wooden teepee-type plant frame over it in late Fall and just cover it with clear plastic only during cold snaps. Avoid letting bud ends touch the plastic.
crap, I’m doing it again.
Please ignore.
Laura. My general rule here in Texas is that plants gotta be tough and take care of themselves. I’ll water them, fertilize them, cut them back and all when need be. But I’m not gonna babysit them.If they don’t want to cooperate, the they get to die. Plenty of stuff that cooperates and follows my rules, just sayin’
Some neighbors hire landscapers to come out during the day when cold weather is predicted and cover up stuff… then they come back in the morning and uncover it… then they come back in the afternoon and… Well you get my drift.
That unicorn suit was pretty bad-ass too. Thank YOU, Messiah Lutheran Basement Rummage Sale!
It comes as absolutely no suprise to me that one could obtain a unicorn suit at the local Lutheran church.
^ Bwaaaahahhhhahahahaha!
Oh totally right, Cathy. God knows I’ve let enough of my own stuff die off when it was too fussy. But if it’s an especially prized plant, and just a freak season not likely to be seen most years, eh.
Sometimes up here we get an early Autumn snap. So early that we know it’s going to be followed by several weeks of pleasant weather. I definitely do run sheets out to the garden then to protect the harvest veggies.
This little house used to be an arboretum in the Winter. Orange trees and such. Screw that anymore.
However, I am planning on growing lotuses again…divisions will be available end of this month…
and NICE ONE BREWFAN!
Dad, there is a picture of me in that hot tub wearing my unicorn swimsuit and holding a beer when I was about six. Good times…
Sad to say, your brother was even more weird than you as a child. Remember all his goofy costumes? I seem to recall him dressing up as a knight with a Michael Jackson vest and gloves, and a bunch of duct tape.
It’s a miracle that either one of you survived me as a father.
Just keeping a plant in a pocket of still air during a snap can prevent killing temps from, um, killing.
Yup. And don’t let Cathy fool you with her allegedly hard-ass attitude. She trimmed off all the banana leaves when she cut them down in the fall, and used them to tuck in the banana trees for the winter with about 8″ of banana leaf mulch, so that they will be in good shape for a springtime awakening.
>> If they don’t want to cooperate, the they get to die.
THAT’S RIGHT YOU FRIGGIN WATER LILIES! YOU BETTER SHAPE THE FUCK UP! IT’S MY WAY OR THE HIGHWAY BIZZATCHES!
Our Connecticut water lilies seem to survive the winter just fine. Not so with goldfish. Next summer, we’re going to take Laura’s suggestion and just throw some bait minnows in there to keep it clean.
they will be in good shape for a springtime awakening.
*squints hard and tries to remember where I heard that phrase before.
*Tries Google…
I remember driving back from Houston to Iowa in mid February (I think -same time as Houtson Livestock Show – I was on the Iowa State Meat Judging Team -like judging livestock but we judged it on the rail and we went to a contest in Houston) back in 1989. And we hit the south side of Dallas and it was just ice and it was starting to snow. We ended up stopping in Denton at a Holiday Inn and got the last two rooms (6 girls and 5 guys)and went and bought beer and sat out at the pool watching it snow!!! No hot tub!!! The next day it took forever to get the border and it really didn’t clear up until we got to Oklahoma City.
I don’t know which was worse that or when they got 3 feet of snow in Knoxville TN and the University of TN maintenance crews plowed the snow to the top of a sloped parking lot, only to have the snow melt and refreeze to form a nice ice-skating rink!!!
Michael’s children dressed up in costumes?
The devil you say!
*squints hard and tries to remember where I heard that phrase before.
*Tries Google…
*lip quivers; single bead of sweat rolls down temple*
THAT’S RIGHT YOU FRIGGIN WATER LILIES! YOU BETTER SHAPE THE FUCK UP! IT’S MY WAY OR THE HIGHWAY BIZZATCHES!
Nailed it!
Got an email from Doug this morning saying it was his email that Instapundit quoted — at length — in this post.
He makes a valid point about one of the less appreciated rewards of practicing law.
^ Major Kudos, Doug!
*squints hard and tries to remember where I heard that phrase before.
*Tries Google…
Holy Carp!
I got two hits and this is one of them:
http://michaelscomments.wordpress.com/2007/05/07/a-pope-for-everyone/
There are 250 comments that range from Animosity to Zen.
Kept me in stitches.
*softly sings “The Circle of Life”…
That’s true Michael, but it’s really not unique to law. Any useful business professional must learn aspects of business that extend beyond their chosen discipline of study. I’m a “technology guy”, and I get speeds and feeds and all that propellerhead nonsense, but for me to be effective and useful I had to become a subject matter expert in many different things, like warehouse operations, distribution logistics, accounting and financial systems, regulatory compliance, basic contract law, configuration management, the USArmy, etc, etc.
It’s a list that never ends. People who exercise that intellectual curiousity generally succeed and are given more responsibility. People who do not generally stay where they are. That’s not necessarily a bad thing either, we need a few superbrains on things like database administration.
Or the law.
I like turtles.
It was actually a propellerhead colleague in Ohio who gave me one of the nicest compliments I have ever heard during my career. He said, “You’re the first lawyer I ever met who cares about the business.” He said it more than once.
I must say, it also saddened me that his prior experiences with the legal profession had been so frustrating for him.
*crushes pudding cup against forehead and belches loudly*
I’ve been through a dozen or so M&As, on both sides of the desk. Never had a bad experience with the lawyers.
Also, sticks a popsicle stick up my nose.
OK, so maybe I’m getting a little maudlin.
Give me a break. Looking back, I’d like to think that my career made a little bit of difference for the good.
*cleans out earwax with little finger, wipes finger on shirt*