Innocent Bystanders

Ames, IA, and Iowa State University, the alma mater of a certain fella we know, has determined that the weight of kegs hitting the sidewalk is a major problem. In fact, the sidewalks near an area where many bars are located and the required beer distributors unload their liquid goods are becoming cracked and damaged.

So, how did Ames overcome this dilemma, without disrupting vital beer supplies?

Why, they made rubber sidewalks!

The city of Ames is installing a rubber sidewalk at a spot near the Iowa State University campus where beer distributors unload hundreds of kegs from trucks for area bars.

The heavy kegs have been cracking the concrete pavement. So officials have decided to install sidewalk pavers made by a California company using recycled tires.

The city’s streets supervisor tested the project by taking a sledge hammer to it. The new sidewalk didn’t even dent.

Apparently, the sidewalks also saved a bunch of tires from being burned. But who cares about that? Beer supplies will continue unabated.

Yep.  With a post on puppies and pooters.

I don’t even have to explain it, do I?

In a thread below, Dave and I were talking about heavy metal fixtures on the target cables of gun ranges.

That reminded me of an obscure, but excellent, song from way back called “Heavy Metal.”  It’s a song that offers the raw beat of heavy metal, but also features singers that can harmonize and serious work by the lead guitar.  Not just showy arpeggios, but real Clapton-worthy artistry.

I found it on YouTube, because it was featured in a truly bizarre South Park episode called “Major Boobage.”

Heavy metal.  South Park.  Major boobage.

I’m the kind of guy who needs to share.  I’m all about the love.

NSFW.

Read more >> Options >>

Last night, my father, oldest younger sister, and I went to a local range for our local mandatory anti-zombie training. I practiced with my Mosin Nagant and my .22 Ruger.

I only fired 20 Rifle shots, and 40 Ruger shots because loading that rifle was something I had to get used to and after the two 10-round magazines that came with my Ruger were expended, I still have to learn how to load a .22 magazine quickly.

As you can see, I still need a lot of practice. But this is fun, and I want more.

Oh, and those zombies don’t stand a chance.

Pistol Shooting.

Rifle Shooting

Ernest Borgnine appeared on Fox News this morning touting his new autobiography.   He is 91 years old and just as full of it as ever.   When asked “what’s your secret,”  Borgnine replied:

“I masturbate alot.” 

Borgnine in his latest role as Mermaid Man on Sponge Bob Square Pants

All these years, I thought only the Dallas Cowboys, Keith Hernandez, and The NBA approached random casual sex with the same vigor that I approach the All-You-Can-Eat Sushi Happy Hour Fun Time at Mr. Sushi. But I was wrong.

It turns out those paragons of virtue and innocence, namely Olympic Athletes not named Kobe, really love to get acquainted with each other after the day is through. So much so, 100,000 condoms are available at the Olympic Village.

While sex is not an Olympic sport it is expected to be an activity in the Beijing village housing 10,500 athletes, all of whom are in great shape and with plenty of free time on their hands once knocked out of the Games.

Athletes have received free condoms at every Olympics since Barcelona in 1992 to help raise awareness of AIDS, and Beijing is no exception.

“There are many young, strong, single people in the athletes’ village and, like everywhere, some will fall in love or other things so we need to make condoms available,” Ole Hansen, spokesman for UNAIDS China, told Reuters.

“A lot of these young people are not married or in relationships so we want to make sure they have the information and tools to protect themselves if they have sexual encounters.”

The UNAIDS, the Beijing organising committee BOCOG and International Olympics Committee are providing 100,000 condoms as part of a campaign on HIV prevention and anti-discrimination.

At the Sydney Games in 2000 athletes quickly exhausted a supply of 70,000 and another 20,000 had to be brought in.

Well, lets see who could be top contenders to exhaust this supply.
First up:

Some members of the German Female Athletic Contingent. These brave lasses gamely shed their clothes to discuss the Georgian War. Well, at least that is what I gathered when I went to the original source document. But my German is a bit rusty. Anyway, here is a snippet from the German version of a certain magazine that has great writing from George Plimpton and lotsa skin. But mostly skin.

Petra Niemann is competing in her third Olympiad, and sailing is her game. “I’ve been working hard with my psychologist,” she told Playboy, as if to suggest this had something to do with sport or being naked.

Kayaker Nicole Reinhardt is one of Germany’s best hopes for gold in Beijing, and is grateful that her sport is about technique, so the “dickere und kräftigere” (”butch”) ladies have nothing on her svelte frame.

Yeah. I told you the interviews were great.

Another contender is Spanish Rhythmic Gymnast Almudena Cid Tostado, who was kind enough to pose for the Spanish version of FHM, which also has great articles.

(more…)

In a conclusion that even I could understand, some smart guy wasted a ton of money coming to the conclusion that sexually appealing athletes can make a shitload of money in the advertising business.

The author of this mind-blowing piece mentioned the usual suspects: Amanda Beard, David Beckham, Maria Sharapova, and swimmer Dara Torres. But the much appreciated newcomer to the scene is Paraguayan javelin thrower Leryn Franco, who I had never heard of until today.

Leryn Franco, 26, a javelin thrower from Paraguay, is competing in her second Olympics at Beijing, thanks to her second career, modelling.

“Modelling is a way for me to continue with my sport, the hours are flexible, and you can earn good money through photographic modelling and the catwalk,” Franco told Reuters.

So, what does this athlete look like?

[UPDATE: PHOTO IS NOW BELOW THE FOLD. IT'S CLEAN, BUT I DON'T WANT TO START ANY TROUBLE.]

(more…)

Here is one way:

Here is how others may spend their time off:

Or, here is another idea:

Ruger Mark III .22.

Somebody, and I think it was Russ, mentioned something about a warning on the side of the pistol. I thought he meant a big sticker. Turns out I didn’t know what he meant. There is a warning about reading the instructional manual engraved on the side of the pistol. And the loaded chamber indicator has “loaded chamber indicator” engraved on it as well. The nerve. Warning people that firearms are dangerous and holding peoples’ hands to tell them when a pistol is loaded?. What’s next? Nagging us that eating raw Crisco is bad for you?

But I digress. As an added bonus, Ruger is offering a discount on NRA membership.

My dad also went with me and bought a Taurus (from Brazil?) 9 round .22 revolver.

Those zombies won’t stand a chance.

I guess I have led a sheltered life, not knowing until today that shooting bowling pins was a big deal.

Anyway, here is a random video I found of this particular activity:
[UPDATE: RG NOTICED THE FIRST VIDEO I FOUND WAS "NO LONGER AVAILABLE". SO, HERE'S ANOTHER RANDOM VIDEO OF A GUY SHOOTING BOWLING PINS.]

Meet Bia and Branca Feres, twin sisters from Brazil. What makes them even better is that they are synchronized swimmers. I could care less if they are on the Olympic team from Brazil or not. But this just proves that all sports should be taken seriously. Here is a photo of them:

And here is a video of the sisters in action. You know, for educational purposes.

Oh, and I bought a .22 Ruger Pistol today, and Lauraw may have a kindred spirit in her hatred of crocs, but who cares about that?

  Eddie, I know you said that you were going to put up a post requesting advice on selecting your first .22 rifle in the comments on the “Self-Abusing the Legal System” post, but I figured that your fatherly duties got the best of you yesterday & you couldn’t get around to it.  So, being the helpful person that I am, I decided to preempt your post and get the ball rolling myself.

  As EB announced in a previous post, he’s now the owner of a scary Russian Assault Rifle.  Well, it IS a Russian Military weapon, and in 1891 when this particular rifle debuted in the Tsar’s army, it was a high-tech weapon of mass destruction (compared to lances and crossbows, anyway).  Now that he’s got one rifle in his collection, he’s feeling The Pull of The Gunstore.  His Mosin/Nagant 91/30 rifle is whispering to him late at night, telling him that it needs a soulmate to share the corner of the closet with.  Another rifle it can talk to when EB & Mrs. EB are at work and the EB offspring are at school and daycare.  Another rifle it can share all it’s hopes and dreams with, and regale with stories of all the times it drove the Nazis from Stalingrad & chased them all the way back across Poland to Berlin.  His Mosin/Nagant wants a younger .22 rifle to mentor and teach The Way of The Gun, and Eddie’s helpless to resist it’s request.

  Essentially, Eddie’s got the Gun Bug, and he’s gotta get his fix or else.

  I’ll leave it up to Eddiebear to write up the post where he asks for information on specific guns, but I just wanted to help build the framework for the discussion with this introductory post.  I don’t think we can start out giving him specific model recommendations before we know what he’s going to do with the gun and what sort of firearm he’s looking for.  So I’ve come up with a few criteria to help narrow down the search:

1.  New rifle vs. Old rifle.  New guns are more certain to function properly (and usually have a warranty to cover any functioning problems).  Old guns have features that would take newer guns out of your price range (walnut stocks & metal sights/triggerguard/buttplate vs. plastic & composite materials).  The biggest problem with older guns is that you’ve got to look them over carefully when buying them to avoid any obvious problems.

2.  Single shot vs. repeater.  If you want to put a lot of lead downrange in a short time, you probably won’t want to buy a Remington 510 single shot or a Stevens Favorite.  Conversely, if you’d like to be able to hit beer bottle caps consistently at 50 yards you’re probably not going to be happy with a H&K GSG-5 or a Remington 597.   You need to decide what sort of shooting you’re going to be doing & purchase the appropriate gun.  Do you get more enjoyment from taking an empty Campbell’s Soup can and walking it downrange with a stream of bullets, or would you love to brag about being able to light wooden matches at 50 feet with your methodical single shot?  There’s no right or wrong answer here, just what’s best for you.

3.  How likely are you to get ANOTHER .22 rifle in the near future?  There’s a reason I titled this post “First Annual..”, eddie.  Guns are like potato chips, Playboy magazines & collectible porcelain Elvis figurines:  It’s hard to stop at one.  If you know that this will be your only .22 rifle in the near future, you need to get a gun that can perform many jobs well, instead of a gun that can perform one job perfectly; however, if you realize that you’ll be back at the gunstore looking to feed the gunmonkey on your back within a year or two, you can get a gun that’s tailored to do one thing well and then get another gun to perform a different duty later.   The only drawback to this strategy is spousal resistance.  May I suggest one potential solution?  Get the wife & kids involved in shooting with you, and they’ll all want rifles of their own.  Then, you can use subtle persuasion to convince them to get ones that you’d like to shoot also.  It’s a win-win situation.

  The great thing about purchasing multiple .22 rifles is that it won’t drain your pocketbook unless you insist on buying rare or high-falutin’ rifles.  Your average good-quality .22 rifle can be purchased for anywhere from $200 to $500, which works out to somewhere between $4 and $10 a week if you buy one gun a year.  That’s MUCH cheaper than smoking or frequenting tittie bars, right?  And it’ll be much more fun……well, more fun than the smoking part, anyway.  And it’s good, clean fun that your whole family can share with you, unlike trips to the tittie bar.  Take your kids shooting with you, and you’re being a good father.  Take your kids to the tittie bar with you, and you’ll have lauraw writing one of those “Hey, check out THIS loser” posts at the AoSHQ featuring you.

  Now I’ll step aside and let the rest of the IB family add their thoughts.