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Think about it y’all January 28, 2007

Posted by daveintexas in Economics, Food, History, Literature.
4 comments

Rocco Prestia is a monster bassist. 

Run Away January 28, 2007

Posted by Michael in Crime.
42 comments

I can muster some sympathy for the draft dodgers of the Vietnam era, but none whatsoever for men who voluntarily enlisted and then fled to Canada because they become “disillusioned” with the war in Iraq.

(CBS) During the Vietnam war, many young men who were drafted and didn’t want to go to war fled to Canada. Today, a small group of soldiers and Marines are doing the same thing in protest of a war they say is unjust.

When you contemplate the danger and the violent death that are ever present factors in Iraq, you may wonder how Americans charged with fighting the war there can bear it.

The reality is that some of them can’t take it. Justin Colby, 23 was inspired to join the Army to avenge the events of September 11.

“I thought that was something I wanted to do,” he told Sunday Morning correspondent Rita Braver. “So I approached a recruiter and said, ‘Sign me up.’”

After serving one tour in Iraq honorably, Colby says he changed his mind.

But Colby was becoming disillusioned with the war in Iraq, especially because it became increasingly clear that Iraq, and its dictator Saddam Hussein, was not behind the attacks of 9/11.

“When I realized these people we were killing — ’cause we killed a lot of [them], I saw a lot of dead people — when I realized the people we were killing had nothing to do with 9/11, that’s when I was, like, ‘Okay, this is not for me! This, ya know, I was wrong.’”

Never mind, Colby, that you gave up the right to decide what is “not for you” when you enlisted, and committed your personal honor to an oath dedicating you to the service of your country.

What gripes my ass is the moral pretention of men attempting to justify their cowardice.  Apparently they have learned this from their elders of the Vietnam era.   

Lee Zaslofsky deserted and found refuge in  Canada in 1970.  Now he is  a Canadian citizen and the coordinator of the War Resisters Support Campaign in Toronto.  He seems pretty proud of himself.

He remains confident in the choice he made more than 30 years ago and says that he is happy to help other young men and women who faced similar dilemmas.

“I never had the slightest doubt about what I’ve done,” Zaslofsky said. “What makes me feel good is that I’m able — at my age — to have the privilege of working with young people who have had the guts and the decency to stand up for what they believe is right.”  [Emphasis added.]

Like violating the oath they took when they enlisted.  Give me a break.

Soldiers Against Iraq Desert To Canada

Oh well, at least we have a good video for this subject.  This song is dedicated to Justin and Lee.

The Monty Python version of that song follows the break.

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How High Should You Jump . . . January 28, 2007

Posted by Michael in Gardening, Music.
4 comments

 . . . if you are attempting to, say, jump over a huge frickin’ python.

About this high, I would think:

That’s Adrian Wilson of the Arizona Cardinals clearing a 66 inch bar with a three-step start.   Wow.  He could jump right over Mrs. Peel wearing the court jester hat she bought at the Renaissance Festival in an attempt to be inconspicuous.  I’d pay good money to see that. 

Adrian gets up!!!

Speaking of Mrs. Peel, you can read her fisking of the Houston Chronicle here.  The woman has no mercy.  Reminds me of a python, actually.  I guess I’m talking about Mrs. Peel and snakes in the same post because she loves  snakes.  Seriously.  She said so herself

One Good Thing About Winter January 27, 2007

Posted by Michael in Gardening.
17 comments

If you have cold weather where you live, you don’t bump into these guys at any time of year whilst strolling through your orchard.

Brewfan Wants One For His Kids

KUALA LUMPUR, Jan 26 (Reuters Life!) – Guard dogs protecting a fruit orchard in Malaysia have met their match — a 7.1-metre-long (23-ft-long) python that swallowed at least 11 hounds before it was finally discovered by villagers.

Wait a sec.  How do you “finally” discover a 23-foot-long python after eleven dogs go missing?  A snake this big can’t be all that hard to find.  I’m thinking that someone was not real good at counting dogs. 

Mrs. Michael and I actually saw a large constrictor of some kind in the Malaysian jungle.  We were stuck on the shoulder of the road in the middle of nowhere while the driver of our car tried to fix the brakes.  Mrs. Michael noticed a small tree that was completely bent over from the weight of this snake.  We never saw the entire length of the snake as it slithered down to the ground.  About then, we cancelled our plan for a walk in the woods while the car was being repaired.

“I was shocked to see such a huge python,” orchard-keeper Ali Yusof told the New Straits Times in an article published beneath a picture of the captured snake, which was almost long enough to span the width of a tennis court and as thick as a tree trunk.

Huge python makes a meal of 11 dogs

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Fashion Week Doomed Without Wal-Mart® January 26, 2007

Posted by Michael in News.
8 comments

NEW YORK (Reuters) – Wal-Mart Stores Inc. (NYSE:WMTnews), the world’s largest retailer, has decided not to participate in New York’s upcoming Fashion Week.”We just elected not to show our collections at that venue,” said Wal-Mart spokeswoman Linda Blakley.New York Fashion Week is a twice-yearly event that gives the fashion industry a chance to view the latest design collections for the upcoming season. The next New York Fashion Week will kick off on February 2.Wal-Mart has been participating in the event since September 2005, when it held a fashion show in a Times Square studio that could be viewed by pedestrians.

This is horrible news.  Without Wal-Mart’s participation, the celebrities and trophy wives of the world can not really be sure what they should be wearing this year.

Even worse, ordinary Americans are going to get screwed.  We count on Wal-Mart to tell us what is OK on the fashion scene.  Without Wal-Mart, how am I to know if it’s OK to buy Mrs. Michael this outfit, for example:

This Sells For Brewfan's Annual Salary

You and I, of course, do not need to worry about such matters.  When in doubt, we only need to wait until Friday and take advantage of the fashion expertise available from the outsourced Innocent Bystanders Advice Department.   Don’t delay.  Now that Wal-Mart is out of the game, you really have no choice but to submit your fashion inquiries to the Innocent Bystanders Advice Department.

Wal-Mart not participating in February New York Fashion Week – Yahoo! News

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The Moral Decay of America January 26, 2007

Posted by Michael in Crime, Economics, Websites.
Tags:
32 comments

Somehow, crime online just does not seem too serious.

TORONTO – Most Americans regard the illegal downloading and distributing of Hollywood movies as something on par with minor parking offenses, according to a report issued Wednesday.

Only 40 percent of Americans polled by Toronto-based Solutions Research Group agreed that downloading copyrighted movies on the Internet was a “very serious offense.”

Never mind that it is a felony.  Note that adding a few pennies worth of plastic into the crime ridiculously makes it much more serious, even though the same intellectual property is involved.

That compares with the 78 percent who said shoplifting a DVD from the local video store was a very serious offense.

Most Americans say movie piracy OK – Tech News & Reviews – MSNBC.com

Why this absurd result?  Why is America losing its moral compass on the intertubes?

For that, my friend, you must consult someone far wiser than me.  And that someone would be our seasoned third world advisor at the outsourced Innocent Bystanders Advice Department, who is standing by at this very moment to field your questions.  Don’t worry, he types English with hardly any accent at all. 

Consult the Innocent Bystanders Advice Department right now!  Here’s a song that may inspire your question regarding the moral decay of America.

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MENSA Friday in Mitchieville January 26, 2007

Posted by Retired Geezer in Heroes.
20 comments

OK Smarty Pants, I won last week and I’m calling you all out.

Another weekend is upon us, is everyone excited? I sure am, because that can only mean one thing: It’s MENSA Friday. By far the bestest game ever in the history of civilization. Sure, Deal or no Deal is pretty popular, but in MENSA Friday you don’t have to put up with that insufferable prick Howie Mandel. Howie in the hell does that guy keep finding work? Only in America, I suppose.

Go match wits with the Mayor

Though Atkins Approved–Pupster Warned to Take it Easy January 25, 2007

Posted by skinbad in Food.
46 comments

Somewhat misleading. This article discusses the dangers of a fine meal of squirrel only in the context of those living near a toxic waste dump in New Jersey. Or is that redundant?

A lead-contaminated squirrel was found in the area two months ago, prompting the agency, along with the state Department of Environmental Protection, to send out letters advising that adults eat squirrel no more than twice a week and even less for children and pregnant women.

Asked to comment, Jebulon H. said, “Well hell. I intend to contaminate the varmints with lead.”

Ohio squirrels are safe after all. Enjoy yourself, Pup. It’s what’s for dinner.

Henry Lee January 25, 2007

Posted by Sobek in Economics.
23 comments

Nick Cave and PJ Harvey sing “Henry Lee.”  From the extremely aptly-titled album “Murder Ballads.”

Also by Nick Cave:

The Mercy Seat (about getting executed by electric chair)

Where the Wild Roses Grow (a duet about murdering Kylie Minogue)

As I Sat Sadly By Her Side (about a philisophical discussion on existentialism)

Deanna (a poppy, upbeat ditty about a couple going on a murder spree)

(Are You) The One That I’ve Been Waiting For (a beautiful song in which, surprisingly, no one is killed)

I Am Definitely Going To See This Movie January 24, 2007

Posted by Michael in Crime, Movies, Personal Experiences, Philosophy, Religion.
14 comments

I will do so because I am a cinema aficionado.   Artistic and understated  films with subtle production values and exquisitely drawn characters appeal to me.  So I am definitely going to see this movie.

(Wait a few seconds, then click on “Trailers.”)

A Letter From Wal-Mart® . . . (Updated) January 24, 2007

Posted by Michael in Humor.
56 comments

. . . is now circulating on the intertubes, and is reproduced below for your convenience.  The authenticity of this letter has not been established.

Apparently Mr. And Mrs. Fenton are retired. Mrs. Fenton insists that he go with her to WalMart. He gets bored with all the shopping. He prefers to get in and  get out, but Mrs. Fenton loves to browse. Here’s a letter sent to her from the store.

Dear Mrs. Fenton,

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may ban both of you from our stores.  We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below. 

Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse was shopping in Walmart:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in  people’s carts when they weren’t looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at  5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official  tone, ‘Code 3′ in housewares… And watched to see what happened.

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We’re Here, We’re Ice Pricks, Get Used To It January 24, 2007

Posted by skinbad in Heroes, Humor.
5 comments

All this Scandi bashing is wearing on me. My great-great-great grandfather came to Utah from Malmo, Sweden. I have a book of Scandi folklore humor compiled from the area I live in.  You people need exposure to some of this scintillating stuff.

A couple of my favorites:

Chris Ole (a Dane) was brought into bishop’s court charged with assault and battery for hitting Ole Thomson (a Swede), with a brick. After the usual preliminaries, the bishop inquired: “Brodder Ole, vhy did you hit dis man?”

“Bishop,” Chris replied, “he called me a damn Danish rascal.”

“Vell, you are von, aren’t you?” asked the bishop.

“Maybe so,” said Chris, “but suppose somebody should call you a damn Danish rascal; vouldn’t you hit him?”

“But I’m not von,” answered the bishop.

“No, not a Danish von,” replied Chris, “but suppose somebody called you de kind of a damn rascal you is; vouldn’t you hit him?”

Once you catch your breath, read the second one. It’s even better.

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