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Gene Simmons Responds to Internet Sex Tape February 21, 2008

Posted by Michael in Ducks.
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Gene is hopping mad about the internet publication of a tape of him with some Austrian hottie, and fires back.

KISS bassist and reality star Gene Simmons has released a statement on his Web site responding to the much-ridiculed sex tape of the rocker that’s circulating the Web.

 Why would Gene be ridiculed?

The video, found at genessecret.com, purportedly features Simmons and Australian spokesmodel “Elsa” engaging in sexual activity to the tune of Foreigner’s “I Want to Know What Love Is.”

Foreigner?   

FOREIGNER???

gene.jpg

I’m sorry, I don’t care how hot that Austrian model was.  There’s no excuse for doing it to Foreigner.   Even if you’re doing a foreigner.

Simmons’ statement in response to the tape appears on his Web site genesimmons.com:

You may have heard or seen garbage that has sprung up from my past. Rest assured the proper legal team is looking at all ramifications and options,” he says.

Doesn’t sound like a denial to me. 

Well, I always try to look for the positive side to a story.  At least some lawyers are racking up billable hours over this.

FOXNews.com – Gene Simmons Responds to Internet Sex Tape

Comments»

1. Sobek - February 21, 2008

“Rest assured the proper legal team is looking at all ramifications and options…”

Good. That was actually keeping me awake at night.

2. The proper legal team - February 21, 2008

the proper legal team is looking at all ramifications and options

and camera angles.

3. Elsa - February 21, 2008

I enjoyed getting that ramification.

4. daveintexas - February 21, 2008

Did I not warn you people about bassists?

We’re awful.

5. GrumpyUnk - February 21, 2008

Now I have that stupid song stuck in my head.

6. TXMarko - February 21, 2008

What’s with the Foreigner hate?

Foreigner rocked, and still rocks, IMHO. My reasoning?

1978. Senior in High School. 8-Track. Jensen TriAxials in the back window of a ’70 Chevelle with 454 cubes under the hood.

The defense rests.

7. Cathy - February 21, 2008

Bassists are the basest.

8. Muslihoon - February 21, 2008

At least it wasn’t Richard Simmons.

9. eddiebear - February 21, 2008

6:
And they had Double Vision.

10. The Lovely Janis Mother-to-be - February 21, 2008

Ok– this is just gross. Gene Simmons has to be one of the ugliest people I have ever seen– could you please do something with your hair and the plastic surgery didn’t help much. Why would anyone want to watch him bang some chick?!?!?

And he is so full of himself!!! Ok– I have watch his reality show and the man is successful, has charisma – but still full of himself and Russ makes fun of me watching the show. And if Shannon Tweed thinks he has kept his soldier in his pants all this time . . . well I think you can all answer that.

11. Cathy - February 21, 2008

his soldier in his pants

That’s a good name for a gun.

Never heard that one.

12. Bart - February 21, 2008

Rumor has it that his penor is not at all epic, if you know what I mean.

Anyway, you know what sucks? Getting another weekend snowstorm, that’s what. 6-10″ predicted. Not happy. 😦

13. Bart - February 21, 2008

Or, should I say, 2-3 genesimmons’ penors.

14. The Lovely Janis Mother-to-be - February 21, 2008

My retired boss (who is like a father figure) was describing what he told his three sons when they were of age of teenage raging hormones and such “just remember to keep a helmet on that soldier.” I love the saying and trust me his boys knew what dad was talking about.

15. Muslihoon - February 21, 2008

Last weekend the forecast was for 0 to 10 inches of snow. Snow accumulation was…negative. It rained, which melted snow.

I put no credence in forecasts.

16. eddiebear - February 21, 2008

Bart:

We are getting yet another sleet/ice storm here in STL

Winter sucks.

17. skinbad - February 22, 2008

Did she call him Dr. Love?

A kid at my junior high could wear a different Kiss t-shirt every day for a month.

And he did.

18. Muslihoon - February 22, 2008

Skinbad’s comment somehow put into my mind the song Online by Brad Paisley. That said, do you know how hard it is to say “online” in Paisley’s (country? Southern?) accent? The vowels are all so different!

19. XBradTC - February 22, 2008

“just remember to keep a helmet on that soldier.”

IF YOU THINK SHE’S FUNKY, COVER YOUR MONKEY!

20. XBradTC - February 22, 2008

DON’T BE A FOOL! VULCANIZE YOUR TOOL!

21. XBradTC - February 22, 2008

If you love her, wear the rubber…

22. lauraw - February 22, 2008

We’re enjoying that same storm here Bart. It’s going to be very lonely and boring here in retail land. The plow hasn’t come by yet either so the parking lot is a mess.

Sigh.

*looks at the clock*

Damn.

23. Cathy - February 22, 2008

Rest assured the proper legal team is looking at all ramifications and options

Gene’s tough guy response: Bring in the lawyers.

24. Cathy - February 22, 2008

We got a little snow dump.

Some folks like to get out in this stuff.

Rationale for the 4WD SUV purchase.

…and of course, their UGGs.

25. eddiebear - February 22, 2008

We had ice yesterday and last night. I am sick of winter.

26. compos mentis - February 22, 2008

I take it Mr. Simmons didn’t know his performance was being recorded, cuz he looks like a total dork. T-shirt on, pants around the ankles. Plus I didn’t see a screen shot of him going down on her with that pink python he calls a tongue. That’s like taking a five year old to Chuckie Cheese and only letting them eat pizza.

27. compos mentis - February 22, 2008

And I’m with MIchael on the Foreigner thing, at least as it pertains to Gene Simmons. I mean, the song’s alright I guess, but one doesn’t think of Gene Simmons bumping uglies with some chick to some lovey-dovey bullshit song. Megadeth’s Symphony of Destruction set on repeat maybe.

28. pajama momma - February 22, 2008

Wait, what? Gene Simmons cheats on his wife?

Yeah, ok whatever. I suppose now you’re gonna tell me a meteor hit a streetlight, a lunar eclipse occured and the U.S. shot down a spy satellite all within 24 hours right?

*shakes head*

Whatever people.

29. kevlarchick - February 22, 2008

Yeah what’s with him keeping his shirt on? I kinda liked his hairy, sweaty chest back in the day.

Our storm has cleared out. The snow was so beautiful last night, now it’s an ugly slushy mess. They did send us home from work yesterday at 330. That was a nice surprise.

30. Dave in Texas - February 22, 2008

>>I kinda liked his hairy, sweaty chest back in the day.

Is this kinda, generally a thing you like?

*gets all sweaty*

31. kevlarchick - February 22, 2008

Dave, eww! You’re a Suit. An IT Geek. And a BLOGGER.

32. Dave in Texas - February 22, 2008

hey, I took my tie off today!

33. kevlarchick - February 22, 2008

Did you take off the pocket protector too? Remove the slide rule and protractor from your back pocket?

34. Dave in Texas - February 22, 2008

I don’t got no protractor.

*hide old yellow card*

35. Dave in Texas - February 22, 2008

it occurs to me that Cathy knows exactly what a yellow card is. Not sure anyone else would.

36. skinbad - February 22, 2008

Yellow card = Chinese comedian?

37. compos mentis - February 22, 2008

GLAR 🙂 @36

38. Cathy - February 22, 2008

it occurs to me that Cathy knows exactly what a yellow card is

I do. Been awhile. I think I pitched mine a few years back.

Kept my 18″ heavy metal business forms ruler though.

39. compos mentis - February 22, 2008

Only yellow card I know is what ya get when ya kick somebody in the ass with a soccer cleat. If you get penetration, then it’s a red card.

40. harrison - February 22, 2008

Yellow card= warning
Red card= Out of the game

41. Dave in Texas - February 22, 2008

Yellow card:

IBM System 3xx Reference Card, a systems programmer reference, used to be a card, it’s a little booklet now. instruction set, condition codes ref, assembler instructions, exception codes, I/O commands… hex/dec converter… character sets…

I still have mine with all my little notes scribbled in it from 1985.

42. Sobek - February 22, 2008

Yellowcard = crappy little band that whines more than sings.

43. Dave in Texas - February 22, 2008

but I’m not a geek.

44. Cathy - February 22, 2008

Thanks for the memory, Dave.

Haven’t thought about that thing in years.

45. Cathy - February 22, 2008

Some guys in my department still had their green ones
and thought they were hot shit because of it.

46. compos mentis - February 22, 2008

Thanks for the memory, Dave.

Haven’t thought about that thing in years.

That’s what Mrs. in Texas said last night.

47. eddiebear - February 22, 2008

Hell, I still keep my sheet with
“Debit on left, Credit on Right” written on it

48. PattyAnn - February 22, 2008

“That’s like taking a five year old to Chuckie Cheese and only letting them eat pizza”

I’m saving this to send to Brew when he gets back.

49. Cathy - February 22, 2008

^ Heh.
EB I did the same thing when I was a bookkeeper doing manual entries into the books for an educational research foundation in the mid 70s.

50. Dave in Texas - February 22, 2008

They weren’t hot shit Cathy, they were old.

51. Cathy - February 22, 2008

Dorks.

Some of them lovable dorks.

Dorks just the same.

52. Cathy - February 22, 2008

Got a Rupee instead of a quarter as change yesterday.

I’ve been robbed!!!! Guess it’s only work 3 cents???

53. eddiebear - February 22, 2008

One of my daughter’s favorite coins is a 5 Somali Cents piece I received as change from a QuikTrip near my house. She loves it because it has an elephant on it.

54. Sobek - February 22, 2008

This is cool stuff.

55. TXMarko - February 22, 2008

Back when microphones still had cords attached to them.

56. TXMarko - February 22, 2008

Back when album covers were an artform all to themselves.

http://tinyurl.com/2pxv2b

57. The Comish (sic) - February 22, 2008

“Rest assured the proper legal team is looking at all ramifications and options,” he says.

I understand this isn’t your average, everyday “celebrity sex tape” situation. From what I hear, this sex tape was stolen at some point in the past. When Simmons got it back, he feared someone may have copied it. So he had the tape copyrighted.

Sho’ nuff, an unauthorized copy of the tape turned up on-line. So the Kiss Army (of lawyers) is now suing for copyright infringement.

58. Muslihoon - February 22, 2008

Really cool vid, Sobek.


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