Songs from the Big Chair

Except for a brief and painful fling with a black and sexy thang that ended up leaving me cold, I’m sitting in the office chair I’ve had for almost 14 years. I’ve been asked what I want as far as new office furnishings. Anyone have an office chair their ass just loves to be in?

This is the only possibility I’ve come up with so far. Pony? Easy boy. Easy.

Reminded me of the old Anne Murray tune:

I raised the seat

You let me rest

I tilted back

And scratched my chest

I popped a Coke

And held it on my knee

You held me up

And gave me dignity

Somehow you cradled me

 

Chorus

You gave me strength

To sit alone again

To stare outside

All on my own again

You put me high upon a pedestal

So high that I could almost see to purchasing

To purchasing

To purchasing

 

And I can’t believe it’s you

I can’t believe it’s true

I needed you and you were there

But I just might leave,

I just might leave

I’m not a fool

‘Cause I’ve finally got a chance at a better chair

 

You held my ass

When it was tired

When I checked Ace

And wasn’t fired

You gave me hope

When I sat on my end

And spammed my friends

With funny jokes no-end

I just laughed then clicked on “send”

 

Repeat Chorus

 

You seated me

You seated me