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Shock the Monkeys September 23, 2008

Posted by skinbad in Crime, Family, Law.
13 comments

Yes, your honor. My client admits to using a battery-powered disciplinary device

——

What’s that? Yes, I suppose a common appellation could be “shock collar.”

However, this was simply a creative and non-lethal means to control some unruly individuals who treated the peace and property of my client with callous disregard.

——

Yes, I suppose if you insist. “Children” would be technically correct.

I would only ask, that as my client strictly and mercifully avoided the “highest setting,” that you will do likewise when applying the sentence.

The World’s Greatest Hobo Has Just Topped 1000 Arrests September 23, 2008

Posted by Edward von Bear in Crime, Economics, Entertainment, Food, Heroes, Law, Lurkers, Man Laws.
Tags: ,
8 comments

Henry Earl is a hobo living in the Lexington, KY area. He has garnered a following for his epic mugshots and frequent arrests. Well, Mr. Earl was arrested yesterday for the 1000th time.

Well, Henry has earned something of a cult following (he’s even been mentioned in Newsweek/MSNBC). The Fayette County jail posts mug shots of their offenders, and of course, there’s plenty of Henry. Most of them are very amusing. Some more than others, but there are a lot of them. To make a long story short, Fark picked up on Henry and now he’s fast on his way to becoming an Internet Legend. And why not? Henry’s exactly the right balance between extremely pitiful and incredibly amusing. You feel bad for him on one hand, but then the guy looks so strangely happy in (most of) his mugshots. And if you read the stories about him, you’ll see that he’s got an awful lot of personality. Certainly more than your basic town drunk. Henry is an icon, a work of performance art. He’s like an Otis Campbell for the 21st century. He’s our schadenfreudic touchstone of intoxication.

And, of course, the musical tribute (WARNING: MAY BE NSFW DUE TO NAUGHTY WORDS):

Monday quote September 22, 2008

Posted by kevlarchick in Man Laws.
7 comments

“Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first. “

-Ronald Reagan

I don’t understand much about the latest federal bailout.  But I know it pisses me off.

Pimp That Blog September 22, 2008

Posted by Sobek in News.
20 comments

Linky.

Let me know if the text is legible in the pics.

The Eternal Struggle Continues Tonight September 21, 2008

Posted by BrewFan in Heroes, Man Laws, Religion, Sports, Terrorist Hemorrhoids.
41 comments
Good vs. Evil
Good vs. Evil

From Left to Right: Good, Evil

I know what you Texahomans are thinking.
You’re wrong.

Being Dead September 20, 2008

Posted by Michael in Music, Religion.
10 comments

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George Brett Is Living The Moron Lifestyle! September 19, 2008

Posted by Edward von Bear in Blogroll, Economics, Entertainment, Family, Food, Gardening, Handblogging, Heroes, Humor, Man Laws, News, Sports.
Tags: ,
4 comments

Folks, baseball Hall of Famer George Brett kindly reminds us that beyond being politically conservative (he is, after all, friends with el Rushbo), he shares another trait with some of the great members of the Moron Army.

Royals Hall of Famer George Brett regales a teammate about the many times he’s shit his pants. Seriously; Brett goes into great detail about this, and even at one point follows the poor guy across the field so that he can finish his story. At one point Brett says proudly: “I’m good twice a year for that. When’s the last time you shit your pants?” America needs to know just how close it came to this being the subject of Brett’s Hall of Fame induction speech. He is really into it.

And I thought all was lost when the assholes at Time Warner blocked the YouTube upload earlier today. But being halfway persistent, I found a site that still has the video up and running (for now). Here it is.

Enjoy.

Very interesting test of perception September 19, 2008

Posted by composmentis in Science.
51 comments

Check this out FIRST, then comment.  Don’t read any comments until you’ve watched the video.

The First Rule of Utah Baby Shower Club? September 19, 2008

Posted by wintersetruss in Crime.
4 comments

You do not talk about Utah Baby Shower Club!

Bring On The Hazing Of The Rookies! September 18, 2008

Posted by Edward von Bear in Ducks, Heroes, Man Laws, Sports.
Tags: ,
42 comments

This time of year around baseball, the minor leagues are winding down, and the top prospects of each team are called up to their respective Big League Clubs for some seasoning, experience on the big stage, and hazing.

Usually, this hazing takes the form of forcing the rookies to wear humiliating costumes and parade around in front of cameras and fans. In 2007, the highlights included (Courtesy 100% Injury Rate) the New York Yankees dressing up the rookies in Wizard of Oz costumes, and some compromising photos of Pittsburgh Pirates players.

BTW, that’s Joba Chamberlain as the Cowardly Lion.

And some no-name Pirates Players

Ummm…..

Anyway, the winner and undisputed champion for Rookie Hazing 2008 is the San Diego Padres, for making all of their rookies dress in Hooters Girl outfits.

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I Like This -lauraw September 18, 2008

Posted by anycomments in News.
17 comments

Don’t know why. I like the stripped down version of this song.

Tuskegee Airmen September 18, 2008

Posted by skinbad in Heroes, History.
16 comments

The local podunk airport had a “fly-in” last weekend. In conjunction, they brought in three of the “Tuskegee Airmen” pilots. I took Mrs. Skinny to hear them speak.

Colonel Herring didn’t speak very long. He went to Tuskegee at age 18 and after pilot training flew in Europe. After the war, he left the service for three years to finish college. President Truman integrated the Armed Forces in 1948 and he rejoined in 1949. He flew over 350 missions in Vietnam. He said when he was in the service, he could not answer questions and people didn’t know if it was because of security or stupidity. Now, he said, they probably just assume it’s because of senility.

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