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Just in case you were wondering…. October 30, 2009

Posted by wintersetruss in Crime, Entertainment, Family, Personal Experiences.

..if you were to, hypothetically, sever Michael’s head, hollow it out, and attach a handle to its exterior surface…..the resulting candy receptacle would hold approximately 3.6 pounds of treats. 

  Obviously, this measurement will vary widely depending on the KitKat:Smartie ratio of the candy givers you’re visiting and the amount of packing you do to get the last few handfulls to fit.  Since we here in Iowa have “Beggars Night” the night before Halloween, I thought I’d give you all some advance intel on the subject before y’all get dressed up and go out begging for candy (or “candy” that’s bought in 750 ml bottles at the Package Store in most of your cases).




  Janis came home from work early to take Moses up to the town square for trick or treating at all the courthouse square merchants.  She brought him out to the implement dealership to see Dad, but since we didn’t have any candy, he got a bucketfull of o-rings, metric locknuts, and the (slightly used) voltage regulator off an old JD 318 lawn tractor.

  I took him around to see some of our friends in the neighborhood, and this picture shows him at the conclusion of the night.  And, since not all Iowa towns buy into the “beggars night” BS, Janis is going take him to visit her sister’s family in Huxley tomorrow afternoon, so that he can double dip.  Just think of it as voting as a Democrat:  trick or treat early, and trick or treat often.


1. Michael - October 30, 2009

Mo, dude, you got a spare Snickers in there?

Help a brother out.

2. Russ from Winterset - October 30, 2009

Since Mom won’t let him have any candy with peanuts in it, yeah. He’s got a snickers for you, Michael.

You want a “classic” snickers, or one of those “snickers darks”?

3. MCPO Airdale - October 30, 2009

Any Reese’s?????

4. Michael - October 30, 2009

Classic, of course.

5. d3ft punk - October 30, 2009

More posts about severing Michael’s head and filling it with candy, please.

6. Russ from Winterset - October 30, 2009

Reeses? A few, but dad’s got “dibs” on the Reeses.

7. Lipstick - October 30, 2009

Dibs on the Smarties!

8. The Lovely Janis - October 31, 2009

Lipstick — we have smarties to share, and various tootsie roll products, cruch bars, gummy candies, suckers, hershey bars, animal crackers, cheese god fish crackers, twizzlers, laughy taffy, nerds, sour patch kids, swedish fish . . . should I go on? I think I will take it all up to my sisters for her to handout to her trick or treaters.

9. kevlarchick - October 31, 2009

DIBS on the metric locknuts and voltage regulator!!


10. The Lovely Janis - October 31, 2009

Sorry for all the typos — hard to type with an19 1/2 month old by your side.

11. Michael - October 31, 2009

Dang, I wanted to try a cheese god fish cracker.

12. daveintexas - October 31, 2009

KC, I will arm wrestle you for that voltage regulator.

13. kevlarchick - October 31, 2009

It’s ON Dave. Bring the guns.

14. Dave in Texas - October 31, 2009

The left gun or the right one?

As the challenged, choice of weapon is yours.

15. Michael - October 31, 2009

>>>As the challenged, choice of weapon is yours.

Nice to see that the code duello lives on in Texas.

16. skinbad - October 31, 2009

Is that one of those monkeys in mourning?

17. Michael - October 31, 2009

He looks pretty content to me.

Maybe he swiped a Mars Bar from the dead monkey.

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