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Michael’s Vid Card Has Eaten the Schnitz June 20, 2010

Posted by daveintexas in Ballistics, Ducks, Handblogging, Law, Nature Shit, Pop Culture, Religion, Sex, Sidebar Flag Bullshit, Sitemeter, Terrorist Hemorrhoids.

He asked for a post.  SO here’s something cool I’ll bet you all have never seen before.

I haven’t seen it.  It’s awesome.


1. Michael - June 20, 2010

Thanks for helping out, Dave. It’s possible that some of our visitors missed this when I posted it in April of 2009 when it was new, and made the Top Posts list on WordPress.

So, now they have another chance to see it. Thanks.

2. daveintexas - June 20, 2010

Oh, did you post this already?

Oh my bad.

3. Michael - June 20, 2010

Heh. It’s a really cool video. The effect of the stop-motion panning through an incredibly violent and silly panorama, from a start that seamlessly ends at the same place, is really stunning.

Kudos to whoever made that. It was a very creative idea.

4. d3ft punk - June 20, 2010

How’s about this thing? From the same folks that gave you that thing.

5. daveintexas - June 20, 2010

I can’t believe I totally forgot that you posted this Michael.

I feel bad.

6. Michael - June 20, 2010

I just had the best Father’s Day call ever from Daughter Michael.

It was so good because it was so totally adult. She can relate to me as an adult.

We talked about Son Michael, her mother, Obama and statism (I’m finally winning on the political front), guns (she wants one, and I will give it to her under certain circumstances), her ex-boyfriend, and so forth.

So cool. Best Father’s Day call from her ever, just because it was totally adult. We both said we loved each other, and then it was over.

See, I was an OK Dad after all, with the opposite-sex child.

That is not so easy.

7. d3ft punk - June 20, 2010

Not easy is growing up a girl named Michael. Jeez, and I felt bad about naming my first (hypothetical) child Darlene.

8. Michael - June 20, 2010

Not gonna watch it, d3ft. It will crash my video driver.

9. Michael - June 20, 2010

Not easy is growing up a girl named Michael.

She was not named Michael.

She was named Daugher Michael.

We called her “Deem” for short.

10. Michael - June 20, 2010

Cathy and I were determined to give her a strong name, not one which ends up with the typical diminutive long “I” vowel sound that people use for girls. Like Nanceeee, or Shirleeee, or Britaneeee, or Courtneeee. The fad names around then. No “er” sound at the end either, like “Jennifer.” That’s a weak name which makes you sound like a derivative of something else. Also, no final “a,” like “Melissa,” another cool name at the time. No final vowel sound.

No way.

Her name is actually Ellen. It ends with the finality of a consonant.

“Ellen” is New Testament Greek, and it means “light-bearer.”

We chose well. I’m proud of my daughter. She is indeed a light-bearer.

11. Michael - June 20, 2010

I should not have posted that last comment.

Laura is going to show up and call me a shmoopsie.

I am not. I am a white-hot crimefighting thug.

(KC’s description of me, which is totally accurate.)

12. Dave in Texas - June 20, 2010

Or an idiot.

That’d be my description of you.

Also accurate.

13. kevlarchick - June 20, 2010

Hi Michael.

Today at church I heard:

“The best Father’s Day for Dad involves a big meal, a big nap, and no one asking him for money.”


Happy Father’s Day fellers. Good men all.

14. kevlarchick - June 20, 2010

And then my Dad came back with:

There are more long distance calls on Mother’s Day than any other day of the year.

There are more COLLECT calls on Father’s Day than any other day of the year.

15. Michael - June 20, 2010

“The best Father’s Day for Dad involves a big meal, a big nap, and no one asking him for money.”

So, KC, you’re telling me that a Catholic priest said something in a sermon that was both theologically intelligent and funny?

*Michael’s world spins upside down*

16. Tushar - June 20, 2010

One of the characters in Harry Potter books is named Nymphadora. That is the wackiest name for a girl.

17. Michael - June 20, 2010

There are more long distance calls on Mother’s Day than any other day of the year.

That is actually true. The telecom networks brace for this. Their switches are engineered for 99.99% reliability during peak load on a normal day (which varies by switch — urban and suburban switches have different peak load characteristics), but Mother’s Day is a real challenge. By 99.99%, I mean a Poisson distribution where 100% is impossible. There are gonna be some folks who get a busy signal before they can redial and get through to mom.

These things are becoming irrelevant as the old phone networks become just another IP-protocol piece of the internet, with no switches, just routers.

I happen to know about this.

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