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People In Conneckticut Are Not All Lame February 20, 2011

Posted by Michael in Art.
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I’m just saying, some people on the northeast seaboard are OK.  Like Scott, who sent me a link to  a cool video about Japanese swordplay.

Nobody here in Texas told me about this.  Why did Scott have to tell me from way up there in Conneckticut?  I’ll  bet he’s still shoveling snow while I am wearing shorts and flip flops.  How did he find the time to discover this video?

Comments»

1. lauraw - February 20, 2011

Scott is the only nice person in Connicutuckert. The rest of us are lame and vaguely malevolent.

We’ve become very tolerant of being called ‘Yankees’ by you muppetfuckers, though, so that’s pretty awesome of us.

*beams with native CT pride*

2. Lauraw's Anger Management Puppet - February 20, 2011

Scott is the only nice person in Connicutuckert. The rest of us are lame and vaguely malevolent.

You ain’t lyin’.

3. Retired Geezer - February 20, 2011

That was a friggin’ Awesome video!

4. kevlarchick - February 20, 2011

Cool vid. And I like the term “muppetfuckers” very much

5. wiserbud - February 20, 2011

And I like the term “muppetfuckers” very much

We use it all the time here in CT. Anytime we see a car driving 60 mph in the left lane with out of state tags, we just know it’s being driven by yer basic muppetfucker.

Or MCPO.

6. Mark in NJ - February 20, 2011

Hey CT’s a nice place — especially the western half. I was married on Lake Waramaug (beautiful!) and still go up a few times yr. to visit in-laws.

People-wise, definitely too many rich a-holes from NYC, but the local schmokels are good people.

7. wiserbud - February 20, 2011

still go up a few times yr. to visit in-laws.

And which lane do you drive in?

8. Mark in NJ - February 20, 2011

I got fast driving out of my system yrs ago…so I go slow but I stay to the right. Hope that doesn’t make me a muppetfucker.

But I freely admit NJ drivers are the worst. Two pet peeves: (1) tailgating even when the driver in front is going the speed of traffic; (2) actually speeding up when you signal for a lane change. Unsafe *and* assholish — good combo.

9. wiserbud - February 20, 2011

so I go slow but I stay to the right. Hope that doesn’t make me a muppetfucker.

As long as you stay out of MY left lane, we’re good.

But I freely admit NJ drivers are the worst.

Wiserbide and I figured out a long time ago that if you see someone driving like an obnoxious douche in CT, you can almost bet the house on the fact that the car will have Jersey plates.

10. Mark in NJ - February 20, 2011

Hey that’s what we say about NY drivers in New Jersey.

But I undestand: when I’m driving in CT, I’m a guest of the Wiserbud Interstate Highway System and am obligated to keep obnoxious douchery to a minimum.

11. wiserbud - February 20, 2011

But I undestand: when I’m driving in CT, I’m a guest of the Wiserbud Interstate Highway System and am obligated to keep obnoxious douchery to a minimum.

And I truly appreciate your efforts, sir.

Now get the hell out of my way, damn it, I’m late!

12. Mark in NJ - February 20, 2011

Yes, of course, Mr Wiserbud, I will remove myself from your way at once

and if you want to stop at the next rest area and blow me, that can be arranged as well 🙂

13. geoff - February 20, 2011

Here we were having a lovely conversation about how, in my summation, all east coast drivers suck. And then it had to get nasty…

14. Mrs. Peel - February 20, 2011

actually speeding up when you signal for a lane change

Wait, so you’re one of those jerks who changes lanes right in front of me and then slows down to 10 under the speed limit? RAGE!111!!!11!!!

Seriously, I have never heard of slowing down for a lane change. If you’re changing lanes to the right because your exit is coming up and you have to get into a slower lane, then yeah, you obviously have to slow, but if you’re changing lanes to the left, then why would you NOT speed up so that you can seamlessly enter the faster-moving traffic?

If anything, I would think that entering the left lane at a speed lower than that of the prevailing traffic is the more dangerous and more “assholish” move. Sort of like those people who don’t use the on-ramp to accelerate and try to join the 60-70 mph traffic at 40 mph.

15. Michael - February 20, 2011

Peel drives a car?

How does she see over the steering wheel?

16. kevlarchick - February 20, 2011

I’m a right lane girl. I will never cause you road rage unless you get on my ass in the right lane. Then I’ll slow down even more.

17. geoff - February 20, 2011

Had a lovely brunch with Cathy this afternoon, before her drive back to TX. She totally aced me out on the check, dang it, so she ended up buying for the entire geoff clan.

Thanks, Cathy – it was very nice of you to delay your trip on our account, and doubly nice of you to treat us. BUT. Next time…

18. lauraw - February 20, 2011

I go slow but I stay to the right. Hope that doesn’t make me a muppetfucker.

Your driving style does not make you a muppetfucker. It’s the muppet-fucking. That’s pretty much it. Stop fucking muppets, man. They’re cute, but it’s wrong.

FYI
*music, The More You Know! Graphic star & rainbow*

I’m a left-lane driver on a two lane highway, and a center-right lane driver on a four or five lane highway. Either way I do 85 mph and spend much of my time on the rumble strip because I like the sound.

19. wiserbud - February 20, 2011

Here we were having a lovely conversation about how, in my summation, all east coast drivers suck. And then it had to get nasty…

fuppetmuckers…..

20. Retired Geezer - February 20, 2011

I will never cause you road rage unless you get on my ass in the right lane. Then I’ll slow down even more.

We must be related.

21. geoff - February 20, 2011

We must be related.

Related to roadkill, ya mean.

22. Michael - February 20, 2011

She totally aced me out on the check, dang it . . .

We are wise to your tricks. Like talking to the waitress and giving her a credit card while you pretend you’re going to the restroom. Well done, Cathy.

so she ended up buying for the entire geoff clan.

Some of whom made me a Batbear. I’m looking at him right now. He’s on the bookshelf across from me in the Batcave.

23. geoff - February 20, 2011

We are wise to your tricks.

I’m going to have to find a master to train under.

“When you can snatch the check from my palm…”

24. Michael - February 20, 2011

Either way I do 85 mph and spend much of my time on the rumble strip because I like the sound.

I like the sound of a rumble strip also. But it tells me I probably should use the GPS system to get home. That way, I can concentrate on staying between the white lines, and not attract the unwanted attention of law enforcement personnel.

25. Michael - February 20, 2011

Batbear even has boxer shorts with hearts on it.

That is so cute.

26. Michael - February 20, 2011

Cathy missed a great sermon this morning. It was on the first section of John 3.

Man, that’s like a week off for the preacher. How can you not have a great sermon on that? Anybody could write a sermon on that passage in their sleep.

Still, Pastor Dave did a great job. He really tied the words of Jesus to the character Nicodemus, the proud and legalistic Pharisee.

Sermon ended with Nicodemus strangely reappearing in the Gospel narrative to help carry the corpse of Jesus to the tomb and pay for his embalming according to Jewish tradition. In context, that’s actually a pretty upbeat incident.

27. geoff - February 20, 2011

Cathy missed a great sermon this morning.

Well, she didn’t waste her time – she educated my daughter on polemic arguments.

28. Lipstick - February 20, 2011

(2) actually speeding up when you signal for a lane change. Unsafe *and* assholish — good combo.

The first time the future Mr. L visited me in LA I was taking him to the airport and the following conversation occurred:

Me: (thinking outloud) mmm, I’ll have to get over to the right lane…

FML: Don’t you think you should put on your turn signal?

Me: Good Lord no! What, and warn all those muppetfuckers so they can close the gap?!

29. lauraw - February 20, 2011

I like the sound of a rumble strip also. But it tells me I probably should use the GPS system to get home. That way, I can concentrate on staying between the white lines, and not attract the unwanted attention of law enforcement personnel.

Nah feller, around here, riding the rumble strip just means you’re doing you best at drowning out the local Classic Rock radio station. Which is pretty much all stations. It does not inflame the untoward affections of the local fuzz. Unless you are also trying to light a joint.
Or have a muppet in your lap.

30. Cathy - February 20, 2011

Awwwwww, Geoff. Love you and your family. It was my pleasure to be with you and have intelligent conversation… been awhile. You and your wife’s offspring are delightful.

The waitress was funny. When Geoff and I were arguing over who was going to get the check, she chose me because I ‘scared’ her.

*Bwaaaahahahaha!*
*All those Scary-Lessons from Lauraw work!*

31. Lipstick - February 20, 2011

It was my pleasure to be with you and have intelligent conversation… been awhile.

Should Michael feel offended?

32. Cathy - February 20, 2011

Should Michael feel offended?

Um. No. Haven’t been home in almost 2 weeks, Lipstick.

33. lauraw - February 20, 2011

The first time the future Mr. L visited me in LA I was taking him to the airport and the following conversation occurred:

Lipstick: Do your parents know where you are?

FML: They think I’m at band practice.

Lipstick: Cool. Gimme some sugar, underage boy who is way too young for me and this is probably a felony.

FML: OK. You smell like my grandmother’s house.

34. lauraw - February 20, 2011

*All those Scary-Lessons from Lauraw work!*

I got into a check-wrestle with my mother in law once.
ONCE.

*shows scar*

I won. That time.

But she is a sca-a-a-a-ry lady.

35. Lipstick - February 20, 2011

Just joking, Cathy.

Laura, are you and my dad trading jokes? Cause he’ll love that one.

Me: Mr. L is at Cisco boot camp…

Dad: Did you pack him a lunch? Don’t forget the thermos!

36. Retired Geezer - February 21, 2011

Mrs. Geezer’s California cousins are visiting for a week. Today he outfoxed me for the check. He told the cashier that my credit card was stolen. The cashier handed it back with a suspicious look.

37. lauraw - February 21, 2011

Your dad teases you about Mr. L’s age??? Ha ha ha haaa, that’s awesome.

Geezer, that’s a pretty good trick. No way I could pull it on my MIL, though. She’d be mortified.

38. lauraw - February 21, 2011

*listening to radio on way to work*

*Fly Like An Eagle comes on*

Oh, God.

*applies right tires to the rumble strip for three minutes*

39. Retired Geezer - February 21, 2011

*applies right tires to the rumble strip for three minutes*

*sends all-expense paid, First Class ticket to Korea to Scott and Laura… for research.

40. Retired Geezer - February 21, 2011

*realizes Korean trip is a little out of budget.

*decides to carve grooves in the road outside Lauraw’s business instead.

*settles on ‘Very Best of Kenny G’ as the music.

41. lauraw - February 21, 2011

FREEBIRD!!


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