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The Follicle As Statement Of Personal Power -lauraw December 2, 2012

Posted by anycomments in Ballistics, Crime, Ducks, Gardening.

In the Middle East, the moustache makes the man.

You are not taken seriously there, without a serious moustache. A full, lush crumb-catcher makes you look older and wiser. Those who cannot grow a proper soup-strainer are turning in greater numbers to artificial enhancement.

Tulunay says he now performs 50 to 60 mustache implants per month on patients who largely hail from the Middle East and travel to his country as “medical tourists.”

Several other surgeons told CNN they have seen an increasing number of patients seeking the procedure, with most patients ranging in age from 30 to 50.

The procedure is known as follicular unit extraction and involves removing follicles from areas of the body with dense hair growth and implanting them in the desired mustache area.

Status is important, and ‘looking the part’ is especially so in other parts of the world. Any side-issues that affect others’ perception of our status become areas of vital self-improvement.

Asked my husband to grow a moustache a decade ago and I think it looked good on him back then. He grows a nice full ‘stache.

Shaving it off did not impair his social status, as far as I know. Well, no. I mean, I don’t really know.

Shit, he could have a moustache again right now. I couldn’t tell you with any certainty.

Honestly I don’t think I’ve actually looked straight at him in over a year.

I still like him and intend to keep him if I can.


1. Retired Geezer - December 2, 2012

I’m not a big fan of the process of shaving, I’ve had some sort of beard since the early 1970’s.

Occasionally I will totally shave it off. I’m always amused by people’s reaction, they usually know something is different but hardly ever guess what it is. Even my kids didn’t figure it out.

That said, I like my mustache trimmed short. I hate dipping it in food.

2. daveintexas - December 2, 2012

I hate shaving under my nose. So I quit doing it 30 years ago.

3. geoff - December 2, 2012

Could never grow a decent one.

he could have a moustache again right now. I couldn’t tell you with any certainty.

I’m completely oblivious to my wife’s hair – it’s her mood that I track. I know I’ve told this story before, but after years of not noticing when she got her hair cut, I decided I was going to make a heroic effort to say something the next time she went. She comes in and I say, completely without prompting, “Your hair looks really nice!”

“Ha!” I sez to myself, “I nailed it!” I was still in the process of mentally high-fiving myself when she said, “We canceled the appointment – I didn’t get it cut.”

I’m so smooth.

4. daveintexas - December 2, 2012


I’m just glad when the grey came in, it was reasonably well mixed and not two streaks of grey under my nose (which would look like snot). I would have had to shave it off.

And I don’t want to. Cause I like it. Mostly cause the chicks dig it. And I don’t have to shave under my nose.

5. Michael - December 2, 2012

“Barbarians” literally means “the unbarbared,” so facial hair is associated with less civilized societies even today.

You can blame Alexander the Great for this whole silly shaving idea. He started it, and the Romans greatly expanded the practice. Look at the statuary of Greek and Roman heroes. Gillette owes their empire to Alexander.

(I read somewhere that Gillette has a very advanced R&D operation. Their lab knows more about facial hair follicles than NASA knows about rockets.)

/Cliff Clayburn

6. Michael - December 2, 2012

In Alexander’s defense — shaving eliminated a food-saturated mop below the mouth which would otherwise be an ideal host for lice amongst his troops.

Also, beard-pulling can be an effective tactic in hand-to-hand combat.

7. Mitchell - December 2, 2012

One thing I’ve noticed about pictures of men in the middle-east (who are usually screaming and generally pissed off about some new outrageous outrageosity) is that they almost always have really, really crappy beards.

I thought about doing the beard & mustache thing again but I have way too much gray in those areas.

8. Michael - December 2, 2012

There are a few guys in Texas who manage to pull off the bearded look with panache and style.

9. digitalbrownshirt - December 2, 2012

My Pinoy blood discourages facial hair, so a goatee is about as much beard as I can grow. I generally shave once a week, mostly on Saturday night for church on Sunday.

10. lauraw - December 2, 2012

“Barbarians” literally means “the unbarbared,”

Close, but no; it means ‘the bearded.’

11. Michael - December 2, 2012

As a civilized person, I shall decline to quibble about such a picayune and irrelevant distinction regarding the etymology of “barbarian.”

*picks nose, flicks booger at Laura*

12. daveintexas - December 2, 2012

Mitchell, I can attest, having no grey in my head,

in my stash hasn’t been a problemo. According to chicks.

13. lauraw - December 2, 2012

It’s neither a picayune nor an irrelevant distinction. Barba = beard. ‘The unbarbered’ would properly include children of both sexes, and women.

I think it’s pretty clear when they talk about ‘Barbarians’ they are talking about the warrior class (men old enough to grow beards).

*dodges booger, loads dogshit cannon*

Of course, we might both be wrong.



14. daveintexas - December 2, 2012

a nit pick!

15. Retired Geezer - December 2, 2012

*dodges booger, loads dogshit cannon*

OK, I chuckled for a whole minute at that one.

16. Skinbad - December 2, 2012

My MILaw gave our departed boxer about a quart of drippings off a roast one time. The d.s. cannon is a real phenomenon (as we found out in our bedroom that night at 2 a.m.—and again at 4 a.m.).

17. Nan G - December 2, 2012

Hubby didn’t get his first grey hair (on his head) until he was 60.
BUT….years ago he tried to regrow his beard and LO and BEHOLD is was almost all grey!
So he shaved it off.

But one thing is weird about Muslim men: they are such conformists!
A few years ago, just before 9-11-01, only old men had raised and bruised marks on their foreheads from their prayers.
Then, after 9-11, especially in Egypt, it became a non-verbal proof of religiousity.
Therefore men who had one (called a forehead-raisin) were most likely to gain a wife.
Then it just blew up into such a popularity competition that young men would bang their heads on walls and even use makeup to color a spot on their foreheads.
Maybe we are seeing a move away from the forehead raisin and to the face hair.

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