A Modern Re-Enactment of Luke 10:25-37

25 And, behold, a certain lawyer stood up, and tempted him, saying, Master, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?

26 He said unto him, What is written in the law? how readest thou?

27 And he answering said, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself.

28 And he said unto him, Thou hast answered right: this do, and thou shalt live.

29 But he, willing to justify himself, said unto Jesus, And who is my neighbor?

30 And Jesus answering said, A certain woman went down to St. George, Utah, and fell unconscious outside her apartment.

31 And by chance there came down a certain priest that way: and when he saw her, he passed by on the other side.

32 And likewise a Levite, when he was at the place, came and looked on her, and passed by on the other side.

33 But a certain Samaritan, as he journeyed, came where she was: and when he saw her, he had compassion on her,

34 And went to her, and carried her to his apartment, and changed her clothes, and put her on his bed and hugged her to try to get her temperature up, and applied his heated dipstick because he wanted to save her life. Oh, and he washed her up while she was sedated before calling the police because he was so worried about her and about rape kits.

35 And when he departed with the police he said unto them, I would have done the same for you.

36 Which now of these three, thinkest thou, was neighbor unto her that fell unconscious?

37 And he said, I don’t know what to say. Then said Jesus unto him, It doesn’t matter, SMOD should be here any minute.