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Avoiding Talking About Primary Results March 2, 2016

Posted by geoff in News.
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Ace mentioned Monty Pyton’s The Four Yorkshiremen skit yesterday, which reminded me of one of our similar threads from 2008:

geoff: Hey, if he’s not going to eat those Hydrox cookies…
lauraw: Why, when we were children we only dreamed of having Hydrox cookies…
daveintexas: Dreaming of Hydrox cookies?!? Oh that’s the life, that is. When I was a young lad we could only dream of dirt cookies, and a glass of warm swill.
geoff: You had warm swill? Ours was always cold. Except in winter, when we made swill popsicles.
daveintexas: Frozen swill popsicles?? Cor! What I wouldn’t have given for a frozen swill popsicle. Out popsicles were composted grunge, on a stick from a tree limb. With roofing nails.
Muslihoon: You’re lucky you had trees. We had to freeze cow dung and use that as sticks.
harrison: You people had food? …and mouths to eat it with?
Sobek: We used to dream of using frozen cow dung. We had to use live cobras smothered in kerosene and thumbtacks!

Which, since we were too poor to have mouths, we had to ingest through our nostrils.

Muslihoon: You had nostrils? We had to breathe through our eyes. And ingest food through our rears.
geoff: Oh, Lord it over us, Mr. I’ve-Got-My-Own-Butt. We only had one butt, so we had to share. I only got to sit down once a week, and I don’t need to tell you what I spent that day doing.
harrison: They let you sit down?
laura: OH, how we would have loved to have a butt to share amongst us! We had to shuffle along on our bellies for six miles to get in line to wait to use the Public Butt- which was filthy as you can probably imagine – with our lower colons hanging free and paperclipped to our shirttails to keep the dirt out.
geoff: Paperclips. So they really exist. Legends were told, but few believed. If only I could see one before I die.
Michael: I had to play the clarinet.

Comments»

1. digitalbrownshirt - March 2, 2016

It’s funny that you mention Hydrox cookies. I just mentioned them the other day in a conversation about healthy food. I asked if Hydrox would be healthy if they were kosher. So of course I had to explain both “kosher” and “Hydrox” to my wife and daughter.

2. Retired Geezer - March 2, 2016

Thanks, geoff, for the laugh this morning. The whole thing was funny but Michael’s line made me laugh.

3. geoff - March 2, 2016

Typical Michael. And typical laura ==> always starting something (imagine a happy face emoji here, but one that doesn’t automatically make the author a dork).

I’d almost forgotten Muslihoon, who disappeared four or five years ago.

4. Tushar - March 2, 2016

Poverty Olympics! Wiser is gonna be mad when he shows up afterr a few days and realizes he missed the poverty Olympcs.

5. Sobek - March 2, 2016

Back in my day we would have killed to dredge up 8-year-old posts…

6. lauraw - March 2, 2016

Wow did this make me laugh this morning. This is why we don’t have to be funny anymore. We can just rummage around in the archives. This place is like a root cellar for preserving laughs.

7. geoff - March 2, 2016

This is why we don’t have to be funny anymore. We can just rummage around in have to surpass the archives.

Fixt.


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