jump to navigation

Crap Tree 2015 December 5, 2015

Posted by daveintexas in Ballistics, Blogroll, Commenting Tips, Crime, Ducks, Economics, Handblogging, Heroes, History, Honor, Humor, Man Laws, Mufuckin Pie!, Nature Shit, News, Philosophy, Religion, Science, Sex, Sidebar Flag Bullshit, Stupid shit, Terrorist Hemorrhoids, Women Ranting, WTF?.
add a comment

For Michael and the rest of you knuckleheads that I love.

May you all have a Merry Christmas.

Please do note the shotgun shell lights you could still smell the cordite on em if you were here.  IF.

 

 

 

Here is a cute puppy November 22, 2015

Posted by daveintexas in Ballistics, Commenting Tips, Crime, Handblogging, Humor, Love, Mufuckin Pie!, News, Philosophy, Science, Sex, Sidebar Flag Bullshit, Terrorist Hemorrhoids, Women Ranting, WTF?.
3 comments

It’s not great content but it is cute content

 

IMG_4016

(more…)

Man You Muhfuckers Are Depressing the Shit Outta Me March 25, 2015

Posted by daveintexas in Ballistics, Commenting Tips, Ducks, Economics, Gardening, Handblogging, Heroes, Law, Man Laws, Mufuckin Pie!, Nature Shit, News, Personal Experiences, Philosophy, Religion, Sex, Sidebar Flag Bullshit, Stupid shit, Terrorist Hemorrhoids, Women Ranting, WTF?.
72 comments

Stop that STOP THAT! This is supposed to be an ‘appy occasion.

And how did I get nominated for the last post here ever? Geoff has been working his skinny butt off posting and such.

Ain’t right. Ain’t right.

 

Yes, this post is going to have a “theme”.

So. 2006 or thGFYerebouts. I was 47 years old. Geezer was 75, Peelie was 13 and LauraW was in county banging a tin cup on the bars and yelling “FILTHY SCREWS FILTHY SCREWS”.  If you never heard this stuff it’s all true email me I have documents and stuff.

I don’t know what I’m doing here. I don’t do this for a living you know.

In 2006 I had no idea how this worked. I had a kid in college and one on the way there.  I was just working and making jokes here and at Ace’s and getting to know you all.  And we’d get in comment threads and make absurd bitey faces at each other and joke around.  Then this, ace called it “The Splitters”.  So we did more stupid stuff and monkeys stopped flinging poop long enough to stare at us as if we were raving lunatics or something.  And then this amazing thing happened. I met some of you, most of you.  I actually came to places and saw your dorky faces and in person for reals.. met you.  You were already my friends then you became my in person touching hugging friends.  And every one of you every damn one of you hugged me and loved me and made me feel ten feet tall, bulletproof and invisible.  Thank you special people for the extra touches you know who you are and I won’t say it out loud here Geoff.

 

Hey Dave how about we all go some place across the country and meet each other for reals?

list
This place, this actual place made it be possible for me to meet you all.  To be friends and to love you. All your cares, all my cares. Fake internet friends became real friends. (thanks Al Gore).

Somehow it meant our personal lives became part of each other.  I am a part of you all. The goofy part, or maybe tummy gas. I’m still a part of you all.  Might be stinky. In a way I’d be proud if I was the stinky part.

OK then, I love you idiots. And I say idiots knowing I’m the idiot and you’re not I just have to drop that stuff at you because otherwise I’d gete sniffly and shit and no way no how am I gonna do that, fuck that.

I miss ya Harrison. You were one of the sweetest souls I’ve ever known who called me a friend. I miss Michael too.  He was a big dumb jerk but he was also my friend and he loved me and you all (and fuck cancer seriously fuck cancer, pineapple/sideways).  Oddly I miss them both in much the same way except I liked Harrison.

But I do need to say something very important that’s been on my heart for a long long time.

Michael, if you’re reading this (don’t you have better things to do?), I’m really sorry about the guest towels.  That was so wrong of me.  I feel bad about that, especially the part about me planting them in your pillowcase before I went home.

That was wrong of me.

Remember Pirate Talk?

tarnation

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you Michael, Geezer, for bringing people into my life that I never would have met. I never would have known them, never would have loved them like I do. Your gift to all of us is so fine. You thought you were making a silly thing. Geezer thought it was a joke, a funny.  Thank all of you for inviting me into your lives, your homes your personal space without freaking out.. much.

What you made was friendships. That’s what you did and that’s the legacy of the Splitters.

How Dave Feels About Centering Pictures

hay

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We people are the people we people care about. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. That’s what y’all did and you had no damn idea even that’s what you were doing. Like usual.

I love you idiots.

This place was a place. Better than ice cream. And ice cream kicks ass.

 

Y’all are better than ice cream and I still need you all in my life.

dis

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

UPDATED

mf

Love Letter to Plywood March 9, 2015

Posted by Retired Geezer in Commenting Tips, Entertainment.
6 comments

I think this video is pretty interesting but I’m a tool guy. I hope you like it too.

How to Wrap a Gift December 11, 2014

Posted by Retired Geezer in Commenting Tips, Economics.
4 comments

You’re welcome.

 

Flying Monkeys September 28, 2013

Posted by Retired Geezer in Commenting Tips, Crime.
3 comments

For Lauraw and Mrs. Peel.

 

flyingmonkeys

 

For Geoff and Skinbad.

 

raisedbypenguins

Was This The Pass That Won RG III the Heisman? October 26, 2012

Posted by daveintexas in Ballistics, Commenting Tips, Handblogging, Love, Man Laws, Nature Shit, Science, Sidebar Flag Bullshit, Women Ranting.
16 comments

Could be.  After years of being OU’s bitch, Baylor made em cry.

 

*full disclosure, I was kicked out of Baylor after 2 years, and it wasn’t just my shitty grades

 

Also, there is arithmetic in here.  Sorry.  Promises get broken from time to time. Tough titty said the kitty.

 

 

 

Sugar Overdose for Today November 6, 2011

Posted by daveintexas in Commenting Tips, Economics, Entertainment, Man Laws, Nature Shit, Personal Experiences, Pop Culture, Sidebar Flag Bullshit, Sports.
7 comments

I used to do this shit all the time with Moses when he was a puppy.

Actually we still do it.  Usually at the moon.

A Bitch Rant June 22, 2011

Posted by daveintexas in Art, Commenting Tips, Crime, History, Law, Nature Shit, Personal Experiences, Stupid shit, WTF?.
10 comments

A week ago I was tuning, just tuning my D string (that’s the 3rd one from the top on a 4 string bass guitar).  I wasn’t yanking on it.  I’m not overtuned by 5 steps.  It’s only a 5 year old bass.

And the post on my D string key sheared off of the base.

That ain’t right.

 

this is so wrong

I have been playing bass guitars for over 35 years and I have never broken a tuning key.  Hell, I’ve never broken a guitar tuning key, and I have abused the shit out of some guitars.

I haven’t made up my mind if it’s poor material (cheap steel) or poor design.  But I did replace it.  Fortunately for me even the gold plated ones I picked when I had this guitar made for me are not unreasonably expensive.

Still…

a good one, below

(more…)

I Wonder… June 1, 2011

Posted by BrewFan in Commenting Tips, Crime, Economics, Music, Sex.
54 comments

…how a senior executive with a global telecommunications conglomerate could be counted on to formulate something daily for this blog but a retired ne’er-do-well can’t find the time to write a stinkin’ weekly main page comment? Discuss among yourselves.

The Wood Stain Help Blog April 26, 2011

Posted by Cathy in Commenting Tips, Stupid shit.
21 comments

Help!  Set a laundry basket down on the pretty wood surface of my kitchen island not knowing it was wet. Bummer!!!

Wood Water Stain! S.O.S. = Save Our Surface.

This morning a lovely mark appeared on my wood surface. I’ve rubbed it with Goof-Off and Pledge, but the mark is still there. Batman suggested I check for a solution online.  Lots of good ideas, but which one should I try?

The Most Difficult Thing to Say Ever April 16, 2011

Posted by daveintexas in Art, Ballistics, Blogroll, Commenting Tips, Crime, Ducks, Economics, Entertainment, Family, Food, Gardening, Handblogging, Heroes, History, Honor, Humor, Law, Literature, Lurkers, Man Laws, Movies, Music, Nature Shit, News, Personal Experiences, Philosophy, Politics, Pop Culture, Religion, Science, Sex, Sidebar Flag Bullshit, Sitemeter, Sports, Stupid shit, Technology, Terrorist Hemorrhoids, Travel, Websites, Women Ranting, WTF?.
50 comments

Michael, it seems you were right.

Wow.  That was difficult.

I mentioned after the big unusual freezes here that I keep saying are unusual AND YET we’ve had em back to back for the past two winters, that I thought we lost both sago palms.  I didn’t even bother looking at this one until today.

Look closer…

(more…)