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Poultry in Motion–New Addition to Touching Farewells March 7, 2017

Posted by skinbad in Ballistics, Ducks, Love, slutbags, Stupid shit, Women Ranting.
3 comments

“Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.”

“What I’ve got to do, you can’t be any part of. Ilsa, I’m no good at being noble, but it doesn’t take much to see that the problems of three little people don’t amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world. Someday you’ll understand that.”

“She’s gone. She gave me a pen. I gave her my heart, she gave me a pen.”

Screw You, Kyler

 

 

A Coveted Innocent Bystanders Endorsement November 19, 2016

Posted by skinbad in Heroes, Technology, Women Ranting.
1 comment so far

No, not a political endorsement–merciful SMOD, please give us a few months’ break. This is some free software that saved my daughter’s bacon and made old dad look like a hero. The story goes something like this:

I was headed to bed the other night and checked on my daughter who was working on some homework on the computer in the study. I was just going to tell her “goodnight” and be on my way when I noticed something wasn’t right. Being a sensitive male, I picked up on the subtle clue that she was sad by the tears rolling down her face. Upon further investigation, it appeared she had deleted about 50 photos from her thumb drive. These were for her photography class and she had spent a lot of time editing them. She thought she had moved them to the computer before clearing off the thumb drive, but apparently not.

I had never had a need to try to recover files, so this was new to me. I wondered if it would be possible to get the photos back by (gasp) PAYING for some expert help. Then I thought, let’s do what any normal person would do and “Google It.” I’m leery of downloading software after a couple of experiences with my teen daughters who got a lot more than they bargained for (ransomware) when downloading games that sounded fun.

Anyhoo–at the top of the list was a program by Piriform called “Recuva.” Get it? “Recover,” like I might imagine a Northeastern moron like laurREDACTED would say it. I recognized Piriform as the “CCleaner” company and have used that quite a bit over the years at the recommendation of IT people at work. So, I figured we could trust it.

I downloaded and installed the free version, chose the type of file to look for and then selected the drive. Bing, bang, boom, there the photos were. Ecstatic daughter, hero dad, grateful Recuva user. Also, thoughtful dad, in regards to just how “deleted” files are that you try to delete. Two thumbs up from a very satisfied user.

recuva-gets-support-for-iso-images-and-unmounted-drives

Poof! Goes Yet Another Promise October 14, 2016

Posted by skinbad in Stupid shit, Women Ranting.
1 comment so far

And what promise would that be? The promise of, I guess, forty-five years of employment as a cocktail waitress.

The click-bait baited me and I read it. Here’s the title: I Was A Trump Taj Mahal Cocktail Waitress — Here’s Why He Shouldn’t Be President

I thought, OK, what have we got? Groping? Lewd behavior? Sex favors for high rolling friends of The Donald?

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Two Centered Pictures September 26, 2016

Posted by skinbad in Ballistics, Food, Handblogging, Nature Shit, Personal Experiences, Technology, Women Ranting.
15 comments

I know I’m behind the times, but the times for me have a-changed. The IT guy took my trusty Dell doorstop away and replaced it with this:

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It’s an Intel NUC. Kind of cool, I think. When is the last time you used the DVD player in your computer?

And furthermore: A neighbor called Saturday afternoon and asked if we wanted a hindquarter of an elk. My thrifty wife got very excited. Of course we do. That was about 3 p.m. We finished the kitchen Clorox wipe-down about 9 p.m. Elk are big mofos.

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I should have weighed it before starting. It had to weight 80 lbs. This was a new experience for me–thanks youtube. Also, a neighbor I called and asked if I could borrow his knife sharpener came over and helped me bone it (huhhuhuh). New respect for butchers gained–my hands and back are stiff, but there is a lot of meat in the freezer and on the shelf (we bottled a canner load).

Crap Tree 2015 December 5, 2015

Posted by daveintexas in Ballistics, Blogroll, Commenting Tips, Crime, Ducks, Economics, Handblogging, Heroes, History, Honor, Humor, Man Laws, Mufuckin Pie!, Nature Shit, News, Philosophy, Religion, Science, Sex, Sidebar Flag Bullshit, Stupid shit, Terrorist Hemorrhoids, Women Ranting, WTF?.
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For Michael and the rest of you knuckleheads that I love.

May you all have a Merry Christmas.

Please do note the shotgun shell lights you could still smell the cordite on em if you were here.  IF.

 

 

 

Here is a cute puppy November 22, 2015

Posted by daveintexas in Ballistics, Commenting Tips, Crime, Handblogging, Humor, Love, Mufuckin Pie!, News, Philosophy, Science, Sex, Sidebar Flag Bullshit, Terrorist Hemorrhoids, Women Ranting, WTF?.
3 comments

It’s not great content but it is cute content

 

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I Made This November 18, 2015

Posted by daveintexas in Handblogging, News, Stupid shit, Terrorist Hemorrhoids, Women Ranting.
6 comments

choppah

Man You Muhfuckers Are Depressing the Shit Outta Me March 25, 2015

Posted by daveintexas in Ballistics, Commenting Tips, Ducks, Economics, Gardening, Handblogging, Heroes, Law, Man Laws, Mufuckin Pie!, Nature Shit, News, Personal Experiences, Philosophy, Religion, Sex, Sidebar Flag Bullshit, Stupid shit, Terrorist Hemorrhoids, Women Ranting, WTF?.
70 comments

Stop that STOP THAT! This is supposed to be an ‘appy occasion.

And how did I get nominated for the last post here ever? Geoff has been working his skinny butt off posting and such.

Ain’t right. Ain’t right.

 

Yes, this post is going to have a “theme”.

So. 2006 or thGFYerebouts. I was 47 years old. Geezer was 75, Peelie was 13 and LauraW was in county banging a tin cup on the bars and yelling “FILTHY SCREWS FILTHY SCREWS”.  If you never heard this stuff it’s all true email me I have documents and stuff.

I don’t know what I’m doing here. I don’t do this for a living you know.

In 2006 I had no idea how this worked. I had a kid in college and one on the way there.  I was just working and making jokes here and at Ace’s and getting to know you all.  And we’d get in comment threads and make absurd bitey faces at each other and joke around.  Then this, ace called it “The Splitters”.  So we did more stupid stuff and monkeys stopped flinging poop long enough to stare at us as if we were raving lunatics or something.  And then this amazing thing happened. I met some of you, most of you.  I actually came to places and saw your dorky faces and in person for reals.. met you.  You were already my friends then you became my in person touching hugging friends.  And every one of you every damn one of you hugged me and loved me and made me feel ten feet tall, bulletproof and invisible.  Thank you special people for the extra touches you know who you are and I won’t say it out loud here Geoff.

 

Hey Dave how about we all go some place across the country and meet each other for reals?

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This place, this actual place made it be possible for me to meet you all.  To be friends and to love you. All your cares, all my cares. Fake internet friends became real friends. (thanks Al Gore).

Somehow it meant our personal lives became part of each other.  I am a part of you all. The goofy part, or maybe tummy gas. I’m still a part of you all.  Might be stinky. In a way I’d be proud if I was the stinky part.

OK then, I love you idiots. And I say idiots knowing I’m the idiot and you’re not I just have to drop that stuff at you because otherwise I’d gete sniffly and shit and no way no how am I gonna do that, fuck that.

I miss ya Harrison. You were one of the sweetest souls I’ve ever known who called me a friend. I miss Michael too.  He was a big dumb jerk but he was also my friend and he loved me and you all (and fuck cancer seriously fuck cancer, pineapple/sideways).  Oddly I miss them both in much the same way except I liked Harrison.

But I do need to say something very important that’s been on my heart for a long long time.

Michael, if you’re reading this (don’t you have better things to do?), I’m really sorry about the guest towels.  That was so wrong of me.  I feel bad about that, especially the part about me planting them in your pillowcase before I went home.

That was wrong of me.

Remember Pirate Talk?

tarnation

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you Michael, Geezer, for bringing people into my life that I never would have met. I never would have known them, never would have loved them like I do. Your gift to all of us is so fine. You thought you were making a silly thing. Geezer thought it was a joke, a funny.  Thank all of you for inviting me into your lives, your homes your personal space without freaking out.. much.

What you made was friendships. That’s what you did and that’s the legacy of the Splitters.

How Dave Feels About Centering Pictures

hay

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We people are the people we people care about. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. That’s what y’all did and you had no damn idea even that’s what you were doing. Like usual.

I love you idiots.

This place was a place. Better than ice cream. And ice cream kicks ass.

 

Y’all are better than ice cream and I still need you all in my life.

dis

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

UPDATED

mf

!!! November 27, 2013

Posted by daveintexas in Art, Ballistics, Crime, Economics, Food, Heroes, Man Laws, Mufuckin Pie!, Nature Shit, Pop Culture, Sex, Sports, Stupid shit, Women Ranting, WTF?.
7 comments

Pecan_pie,_November_2010

I Am In Charge of Meat Fire On Saturday October 7, 2013

Posted by daveintexas in Ballistics, Food, Nature Shit, Philosophy, Science, Sex, Sidebar Flag Bullshit, Stupid shit, Women Ranting, WTF?.
11 comments

This is gonna be GREAT!

 

How_To_Start_A_Barbecue_Fire-1md (336x448)

 

Eerybody just chill.  I got this.

 

Texas Wins Another Case Against Dept. of Commerce June 5, 2013

Posted by daveintexas in Ducks, Entertainment, Food, History, Law, Nature Shit, Sidebar Flag Bullshit, Women Ranting, WTF?.
8 comments

I met Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott last year at a luncheon, and had a chance to speak with him a bit.  He was just celebrating a successful case filed against the EPA.  I asked him “what is it that you spend most of your time on?”  and he answered “suing the Federal government.”

Loved that answer.  Here’s another one, successfully pushing back a stupid emergency ruling that arbitrarily shortened the red snapper fishing season in Federal waters off the coast of Texas.

Abbott understands federal bureacracies abuse their power constantly, and doesn’t back down from a fight.  The case he was celebrating was a ruling in the 5th Circuit Court of Appeals that the EPA had improperly rejected the state’s “Flexible Permitting Program” regarding the establishment of controls over permits for electricity generation plants.  Texas wanted to keep control of permitting in our hands and not the EPA’s.  The EPA’s intention was to take it over and start denying applications.  It’s what they do.

Here’s a snippy NPR article about the outcome of that case.  Forget the typical NPR bullshit, look at the photograph of Greg Abbott in the article.

Greg Abbott is wheelchair bound.  Nice photo, isn’t it?

Incidentally, Texas was thrown into the provisions of the Cross-State Air Pollution Rule based on a model that showed a monitor located across the street from a steel mill, shows a theoretical reading that is slightly above attainment.

A monitor in Illinois.

Let’s be very clear about the facts.  The last-minute inclusion of Texas in the sulfur dioxide portion of the rule is based on modeling that says an Illinois monitor, located across the street from a steel mill, shows a theoretical reading that is slightly above attainment.  Actual data from 2009 forward shows that this monitor is meeting the federal air quality standards today.  And even if the feds relied on their own computer simulated modeling predictions, that monitor would be in attainment in 2014 without any reductions from CSAPR.  So does Texas’ tenuous link to this monitor justify the state’s inclusion in CSAPR? No.

He’ll run for governor soon.  I’ll support him.

Feeling Guilty November 2, 2012

Posted by Retired Geezer in Family, Women Ranting.
2 comments

Snap.