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London Olympic Toilets Must Not Be Offensive September 24, 2008

Posted by Edward von Bear in Ducks, Economics, News, Politics, Terrorist Hemorrhoids.
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13 comments

In preparation for the 2012 Summer Olympics, designers for the London Olympic Park have determined that the sensitivity level for the facilities must go to 11. How is that feat accomplished?

Easy, my dear chap. Sensitivity is accomplished by placing toilets in a certain fashion so as to not face Mecca, which would be a bad thing. And that’s not all. It seems washing facilities will also bear the Seal of Approval.

An ODA spokeswoman confirmed that a ‘percentage of general toilets would not face Mecca’ out of sensitivity.

She could not say how many toilets would turn away from the East.

Also as part of the design, special washing facilities will be linked to Islamic prayer rooms.

It is not the first time toilets have changed direction to accommodate Muslims.

Last year, thousands of pounds of taxpayers’ money was used to ensure toilets at Brixton prison in London did not offend Islamic law.

Muslim prisoners complained of having to sit sideways on toilets so as to not break code.

Faith leaders in the government pressured officials to approve turning the toilets 90 degrees.

Well, at least that’s one thing off my mind. Now that Olympic toilets will be tolerant, the Religion of Peace will leave us alone. Right?

Right?

Personally, I am more upset with the substandard quality of those low-flush European toilets than anything else. But that’s just me.