Ace’s 12 Seconds of Fame August 8, 2006
Posted by John in Personal Experiences, Terrorist Hemorrhoids.trackback
Personally, I didn’t know he could last 12 seconds …
George Lucas.
Ace.
You make the call.
(If anyone has better resolution, let me know. I hacked this from the HotAir Feed using Gimp(Appropriately)).
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Innocent Bystanders 
Ace pic isn’t coming through. I watched it. I was hoping for a little more bad ass, but who knows what people were hoping for before they met me.
Not really. But close.
I mean the goofy friend. Not the star–refers back to doppELganger thread.
Separated at birth?
Like I said at his site, there goes my image of him as a short Black woman.
My wife saw the video before I did, and she called to say “wow, he could be your brother”. My pic at “Faces from Aces” doesn’t do the resemblance justice, considering I wasn’t sporting the goatee back when it was taken.
Fox’s makeup people did an admirable job of covering up all the dried vomit on his jacket (maybe it was the lighting?), and the coffee enemas apparently woke him up long enough to get this one sound bite.
Skinny you didn’t tell us you resemble Sloan. You’re a pretty boy all right.
Russ, you and Ace are adorable. What does Ace’s voice sound like? James Earl Jones? Steven Tyler? Bette Midler?
Kevin Smith, with a little bit of Ben Steyn (as Ferris Bueller’s history teacher) mixed in for good measure.
He sounded a lot like a guy who’d been up half the night snarfing energy drinks & chain smoking while he stews in a panic-induced pool of his own sweat. Which is quite a coincidence, I gotta tell you.
Seriously, it’s Kevin Smith, without as much nasal inflection.
Sloan makes me do the Homer noise. No, I don’t mean Jerry Sloan.
Ace has put me in an outing mood. We’re all friendly morons here aren’t we? Acutal photo here (scroll to page 2)
Click to access 2-03news.pdf
I told you guys – average looking dude with bushy hair. I wonder if this means I can stop hiding his super secret anonymity now.
I screwed up. You know who Ace’s voice reminds me of now that I’ve had a little while to mull it over? Bill Lumbergh from “Office Space”.
Uhmmmmmmmm, yeah, Mr. Hajj? We’re gonna need you to move those toys over here to get better lighting for the picture, uhmmmm Okay?
Skinbad
That was a funny article-very progressive for a Morman school! That explains why they have you behind bars, but it will make you look strange if they put that photo on the Faces of Aces site! You will be the only person behind bars, but possibly not the only person who should be!
or who has been before.
ahem.
Thanks Jayne. I work at a state school. I love my church, but I’m just fine not working for it for a living–as employees at BYU do. If I worked there I wouldn’t dare enter any “Little know facts about Dick Cheney” contests. I also wouldn’t dare click on any of Steve’s or Amish’s links.
Does anyone know the address of the Faces of Ace site? Are we getting a Hands of Innocent Bystanders site? Maybe we could just incorporate the two.
jayne –
http://www.slublog.com/faces.htm
Russ, who’s the guy with the day of beard and the ‘stache who caught you?
Was it Russ who recommended the Big Fish flick? Suspicious.
Thank you steve-in-hb. We need to update it now that we have Skinbad and Steve’s pictures-and, Ace.
Dave tell us about your time in the Big House.
Bought time for KC to fork over that long-awaited submission to the Faces page.
Funny thing about that picture: My wife took it while we were on our honeymoon. Guided walleye fishing trip at Leech Lake, and we hit the honey hole about 10am. We were drifting over a submerged island, and catching about 3 fish every time. I caught this old girl about halfway to my limit, then decided to take her picture & let her go. We didn’t have a scale on the boat, but she measured 31″ and probably weighed about 9 pounds.
If you think that fish is impressive, you should have seen the Northern that got away. I swear I saw Gregory Peck tangled up in all the harpoon lines on his back when he surfaced near the boat.
geoff, I just don’t feel pretty today. Especially after hearing about Russ’s beautiful girly-fish. I can’t compete.
People tell me that I look like Dave Chappelle. Personally, I don’t see the resemblance. 8)
KC my first brush with the jail cell happened at 13.
A friend invited me to Six Flags… the Friday night before we were to camp out in the back yard with two other guys, tents and sleeping bags and the whole deal. They were in my Scout troup.
Carl, bless his little retard heart had invited 4 girls to go with us. We all met in the back yard.
I was one excited little adolescent.
We paired off, me with a girl that was as tall as Carol on the Bob Newhart show. Same hairdo as I recall.
The cute little brunette said “let’s go skinny dipping”. And the four retarded guys said “oh HELL YEAH”
So we wandered over to an apartment complex and stripped and jumped in the pool. Like this wouldn’t irritate residents at 3 in the morning.
Next thing I know, there’s a bunch of cops shining flashlights on my bare ass. And the girls are all grabbing their clothes.
But for a moment. A brief moment you’ll pardon the pun. It was Camelot. A bright shining moment in the sun. I will never forget it.
Nor will I forget being dragged to the Carrollton PD and calling my dad at 3 in the morning to explain that I had been arrested for being a “child in need of supervision”.
Longest ride home of my life. Dad didn’t say much. No temper, which surprised me.
The next day he took me to work with him (on a Saturday, like he did when I was little, and watched all those dials and lights and buttons at that NASA place in Florida). And as I said hello to his 20+ year old secretary who I was in love with cause she was bee-yootiful, he said, I’ll never forget it,
“say hi to my genius son. The Midnight Mark Spitz”.
I was a bit embarrassed, but deep down I felt cool having had my “brush with the law”. I think dad actually got that… his smile was kind when he was telling the story.
We never talked about it though so he could have been dicking with me.
Dave, that explains everything. Thank you. It’s always the chick’s fault, isn’t it?
pretty much, yeah.